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Which one?

I've been in love before. I gave that relationship my all. I fought for it like **. I begged him not to leave me. I felt nearly suicidal when we broke up.
I met my boyfriend months later and never felt alone again. I'm not in love with him. I knew I could never love him that way. His family comes from money. He's paid so many of my bills. He's helped me out so much.
The guy I'm considering leaving my boyfriend for isn't that ** the girl always leaves her boyfriend for. He's a nice guy too but he works for his money. He's your typical boyfriend, he doesn't pay your bills.
I don't live with either one but I see them both a lot.

After being in love the first time and it not working out, I feel like love is a waste of time. Like way go for love? To be nearly suicidal again later at heartbreak?

I'm in love with the second guy.. He also seems to fit in my lifestyle better..
Do I go for love or do I go for security...

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