This year just been total bullshit for me. I don't whether or not to blame school, my life or my self. First of I'am in high school and I'am 16 about to turn 17 soon. And a lot of things been bringing me down. Such as my mom doing stupid things, and her f****** crazy so-called friends. My stupid family members and typical high school romance. First off this girl in my class who I like is an beautiful angel to me. I loved everything about her; her hair, her thick voluptuous body, her big rump, the way she laughed, the way she sung. I just loved everything about her and more. I tried many times to tell her that I like her... no loved her. My heart always skipped a beat when she would walk by me. Then one day I was able to tell her and then for the next few day she started to notice me and say hi.But then as time went on she just started to ignore me. Even when I would talk to her I could hear that she was losing interest in me.
Then like a few days ago back in class she was talking to her friend saying that she was having s** with someone (who I later found out it was her old boyfriend who cheated on her and many other girls as well). And I was like why did I hear that much less why would you say that when I'am around. Makes me wonder...maybe she wanted me to hear it so I can finally leave her alone... And it sucks because when he gets bored of her he'll toss her aside and go f*** someone else (also took her virginity by the way).Not to mention I was going to ask her what she treated me the way she did but after I heard this I don't want to any more. So now its the end of the year and I feel lonely... people told me to move on and I tried but the other girls in school just also treat me the same... And the girls that are close to me as a friend make me question there loyalties.
I try to go out to meet people but the places to are to far away from where I live... I know things will get better and I get up and try to have a nice day but something always happens and I get knock back down... I don't even know what's "having a good day" anymore. And sometimes it just makes me sick of seeing people happy and/or in love. Does anyone have any advice what I should do, because it would help greatly.