Do i deserve another chance to love animals?

I am 15 years old and have owned terrapins, hamsters and Guinea pigs so far.
Tragically I did not know how to properly take good care of them and the terrapins lived for only a year, the hamsters close to 2 years, and the Guinea pigs 7 months due to my negligence.. I cry every night whenever I think of my Guinea pigs that passed last December because I was a terrible owner and I swore to God, on the days of their deaths, that I must never own a pet ever again as I do not deserve the precious animals. I feel ashamed that I was an irresponsible owner. And guilty. Very. I do wish to adopt a pet cat though, and have wanted to for a few months now. But due to my promise to God, I have never been able to forgive myself for causing the too early deaths of my guinea pigs and have only been able to watch videos and tutorials about cats and I have read at least 50 articles about caring for cats. I have also looked at adoption galleries in my local animal shelter websites and adored the 2-3 year old babies but unfortunately I still haven't forgiven myself and don't have the courage to adopt any animal, much less a cat. I need guidance and thoughts as to whether I deserve a chance to adopt a cat. Call me stupid for caring so much for what others think, but I need these thoughts or else I can never forgive myself. I don't know if God allows me either. Thank you for reading my confession, these are words from the bottom of my heart.

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  • Don't promise your deities not to forgive yourself. That is just self-abuse. I understand your pain. And you are a very good person for understanding that your neglect was wrong; most people who have animals abuse and neglect them and never even realize that what they're doing is not normal or right. I am an animal lover and have worked with animals my whole life. Here is my suggestion. Don't go straight to cats. They are independent, but they can have behavioral problems that can lead to serious issues if you don't know how to care for them. Try something very easy to care for, clean and hardy. My suggestion is a leopard gecko. If you have issues with the idea of owning a reptile, remember that that is a learned behavior and you weren't born thinking that reptiles were icky [if you do :p]. I have a leo myself and he is very hardy, very clean and easy for care for. Being a reptile and a desert creature, he doesn't even need to be fed every day -- so if you miss a day or even two, you don't have to beat yourself up. [You still SHOULD feed them every day, of course!] They live for a while, only get to be about 12 inches long, and don't make noise or mess up your house. Look into caring for a leo if you think this would be right for you, and I think you can learn to trust yourself with more challenging animals in time.

  • Since you are genuinely sorry and feel that you have changed due to your previous experiences, I see no reason why you shouldn't be able to have a pet to love again. It sounds like you've really done your research this time. It's also a good idea to get to know other people with cats so you can swap tips and tricks for looking after them. Good luck! x

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