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Scared I will Never Get a White Woman Pregnant
I am in my late 40s.I am so scared that I will grow old and die without having a child with a white woman.
I am in my late 40s.I am so scared that I will grow old and die without having a child with a white woman.
Wow you are always ahead of me! She thinks I don't know her cycle or even how to determine it but that was one of the first things I figured out about her. It wasn't because I wanted to knock her up then but just because I was so amazed by her body that I wanted to know everything but a man can't really ask a woman about all that so early in a relationship. She has always used the gel for b.c. even before we met because she isn't able to use any of the hormone methods (pill, ring, etc.) and she's even had me do it using the applicators before we **. I don't think I would ever do this but I'll be honest....I have fantasized about using a blank or an empty or just misapplying it and then if she gets pregnant I would pretend to be as surprised as she is. I mean the gel isn't nearly as effective so the possibility always exists anyway (maybe 10%) and in my fantasy when I don't give her the gel I ** her more and I just keep ** and ** until I have nothing left and then I send her home to her husband virtually certain that she has my baby in her. Like I said I don't think I could do that to someone I love but it's still a hot fantasy I have. Plus I assume she's ** her husband a lot too so if she turned up pregnant we couldn't be sure who the father was until he/she was born because I'm sure there are days when she's ** us both. And something else about that..... it surprises me that I'm not bothered about Agnes ** us both. In other circumstances that might really depress me but she's giving me more than any other woman ever has (and better) and honestly it is really exciting to be involved with a woman who can ** as much as Agnes can and yet still keep ** more and more. (She told me that at one time a few years ago she was dating five different guys outside her marriage.....can you even believe that???!!!) But mostly I just wanted to say that you just keep seeing all of this so far ahead of me. I'd hate to play chess against you. :)
I bet you,if you ask her to get pregnant she might say yes. You are very creative in your fantasy and it may work:). When I was much younger,a buddy of mine married a woman who had no intentions for staying with him.She refused to get pregnant and was using birth control pills.Amazingly,my buddy will freeze her bottles of pills all day long while she is at work and them he would thaw them in the microwave whenever she was on her way home. She ended up getting pregnant twice,had a boy and a girl,but it seems like they have developmental problems. They learned late, etc.The parents eventually divorced,woman took the house and my buddy has mental issues. In other words,it may not be good to be sneaky,she may resent you.She may love you forever if she made a sound decision. Man you enjoy,you have a good deal going:)
Sorry to take so long to reply but it was a while for me to work up my nerve to ask her about having my baby. I took a lot of time to explain how much I love her and how much I wanted her to be the one to have my child or children even if she had to raise them secretly within her marriage: I just wanted to share that parental bond with her. She cried and said none of her lovers had ever done anything but try to be sure they didn't knock her up and then cried more when she explained that her husband had gone to the doctor 3 yrs before and got a vasectomy without telling her and as a result we couldn't have any kids unless she left him and she can't do that, at least not for a few more yrs but by then she'd be too old to have kids safely. It hurt her to tell me that she couldn't give me a family not even a secret one. She said she could tell how much I wanted a family so she told me she wouldn't see me anymore so I could go find "a nice girl, not a married ** like me" to have my kids. I refused to accept it and said that kids don't matter to me as much as she does but she said it was over and she wasn't going to ruin my life just because our ** life was so ** spectacular. The next day she applied to transfer out of our department and it was granted two weeks later. She'll move to the new department at the first of the month. I don't know what I'll do without Agnes in my life. I've tried everything up to and including begging but nothing has worked. I'm going to keep trying but down deep I think this is really over. The irony is that after losing so many white girls to black men now I've also lost a black woman to a black man. I think this is just the story of my ** life: can't keep my women away from black men (or maybe vice versa).