I'd rather do it myself

My wife and I have never had a good s** life. We met when we were 21, and have been married for 14 years now. At our peak, just after marriage, we were having s** maybe three times per month. It was just never a big thing with us. She had a kid already, so maybe that was a part of it. We never had that "just us" time.

Anyway, we had our third and final child together almost exactly one year ago. Once my wife started getting morning sickness, we quit having s** altogether. So it's been about one and a half years now.

She wants to start having s** again. But the truth is, I can't get an erection thinking about her anymore. I'm so used to watching p*** and taking care of myself at this point, that that's the only way I feel like I can get off anymore.

We will lay next to each other in bed. She will lean against me - always her sign that she wants me to start putting the moves on her - I will let my hands wander over her, trying to get any sort of erection going. And there's nothing.

I'm not impotent. I still j*** off almost every day to p***. And the erections are still just as hard as they were 10 years ago. But something about my wife now just doesn't do it for me. I WANT to have s** with her. I want us to have a normal relationship. I do love her. There's just some mental block and I don't know how to fix it.

Sep 25, 2014

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  • Stop watching p***

  • Just w*** in front of her

  • Okay, you want a real answer? Here it is: You don't need counseling, you need to take a break from p***, and to hold back of jerking off for at least a week. Simple as that! No jerking off, and cut back on the p*** for a good week, and you will be ready to have s** with your wife again. Trust me, it's the only way. I know it's hard to give up the p***, and we all love to j*** off, but this is affecting your marriage, so you have to fix it. I'm in my 50's and I try to give myself at least 5 days of abstinence before s**. On rare occasions, I can get by on less, but too much jerking off really does mess you up. I usually plan my wanks for after s** with the wife, later that night or the day after. Then I hold off for a few days. I still watch p***, but I try not to get too into it. Holding off helps a lot, especially as you age.
    I loved the idea commenter #2 suggested. That could work too if your wife is into it.

  • No. The problem isn't the p*** - most if not all guys in the world beat off ot p***. It's normal and perfectly healthy. But most are still capable of getting it going for their other half.

    As the confessor said, they are still easily able to get it up, so the problem is clearly psychological, not physical. Not j********** for a week isn't going to make a difference, they need to address the core of the issue, which is a lack of physical desire for his wife.

  • Try seeing a counselor. Obviously the problem isn't just going to go away by itself, so seek help in identifying the issue from a professional.

  • This happened to me, I suggested to my husband that we have a mutual w***. I spread legs and fingered my c***, he knelt between my legs wanking, the 1st time he sprayed me with s****. The second time he f***** me like s p*** star

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