My Daughter treats her Daughter just the way her Mom treated her.

My Ex Wife was a B****! She couldn't talk to people in a nice way, and she treated our Daughter the same. If our Daughter broke something by accident my Wife would be on her for days about it. Always had to bring it up days after the Fact. My Daughter has a 13yo Daughter and does the very same thing to her when she does something wrong and cannot speak to her without that irritated Tone of Speaking just as her Mom did to her. They came to visit me a few Weeks ago and by the Second Day I wanted to send my own 34yo Daughter to her Room for a "Time-Out" I was so mad with her. My Grand Daughter couldn't do anything right according to my Daughter, and she couldn't respond nicely whenever her Daughter asked a simple question. By Day Three I had enough and took my Daughter outside for a Father/Daughter Talk. I was so mad with her I just stood there outside with my Daughter without saying anything for a few Minutes until I could calm myself down so I wouldn't sound like a raving lunatic. So once I was calm enough I tried to explain everything that needed to be said. I NEVER bad mouthed her Mom during our Divorce one time but after what I saw something needed to be said, and her Mom was going to be included on this Conversation. So after I told my Daughter what I saw with her and the way her own Mom treated her she stands there and gives me this look as if I just landed from Mars. So they were there Two more Days and nothing changed, and sad to say I wasn't upset when they went back home, because my Talk seemed to fall on Deaf Ears just the way they did with her Mom many Years ago.

Sep 9, 2015

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  • You've said what you had to say, which I agree with you 100%, but now you have to step back. She needs to make her mistake like the rest of us. All you can do from here on is don't alienate your daughter to the point of her excluding you from her life. You can hang out with your granddaughter and be a positive influence. Do not badmouth her mother even though you're right. She'll tell her mother and that'll be the end of your relationship.

    You sound like a good father. I hope she'll appreciate your opinion in the future. She and her daughter are lucky to have you.

  • You know you may have had more of an impact than you know. We learn a lot of our behaviors from how we are raised. But change is hard. And your daughter has been living that way for 34 years..and has been raising her child for 13 years without anyone saying anything to the contrary. No parent wants to be told how to parent. But maybe somewhere deep down, you may have hit a never know. Let her think about it. You really can't expect that after one conversation, she was going to change her ways. It took a lot for you to say something..and maybe she was defensive. Hopefully, she'll go home and really think about what you said and consider changing. Call her in a couple of days and talk. And bring it up again and don't rehash, just say.. I care. I should have stepped in and I'm sorry I didn't.

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