Busted and lost
I'm a gay man in my late 40s. A much younger guy (but not a minor) needed to stay with me. He's a dear friend and had nowhere else to go. I put a spycam in the bathroom so I could watch him undress and get in the shower. After a month he found it. I've never been hated by another human the way he hates me now. I deserve it. I don't know why I would do this to someone I love. It's like he stopped being a person when I saw him on the video, just an object for my l***. The friendship is gone. We can't even look at each other. I don't know how to explain why I did it because I don't understand it myself. He thinks the camera was all part of an elaborate plan to film him. It wasn't. Worst is that he can't leave my house so we're trapped together with all these swarming emotions of mistrust and betrayal. I hate myself and want to die.