A drunkards tale

I was a pretty angry kid. I remember there were certain words or phrases that could set me off just like that, trying to beat the s*** out of some other kid. It got so bad that I started taking medication for it and going to therapy.

I dealt with it and I now know that my anger was irrational and the reciprocation of my broken home onto the students of whatever school I was attending at the time.

When I grew up I became calmer and a generally nice guy, had a lot of friends, some of the time people came to me about personal problems about mental health and I gently pushed them towards my therapist and introduced them to some group therapy sessions.

I got a job and pulled my life together, became a responsible person and helped out in the community. One of my friends had this friend that had heard of me through him and he as so handsome and gorgeous I was instantly attracted to him.

Even guys that weren't bi or homosexual would have been attracted to him, he was perfect. Anyway, he came to me and asked for my help with his own mental health problems and I did the usual thing I do, but this time I went to the group therapy sessions with him and I became personally involved with him and grew a relationship between us.

He was the perfect person for me, amazing looks, gentle, understanding and caring. We became a thing and announced it to our friends and accepted the congratulations and stood against the people who said we weren't right in the head or something like that.

Then it all changed.

One day I asked him what the scar on his forehead was from, he had long hair and I had only just noticed, and he went really quiet for pretty much the rest of the day. One day we were having s** and he suddenly attacked me, beating me with his hands and smacking me about, calling me a w**** and taking pictures of me naked and beaten up. After that he said that that scar as from when he was a kid and I had flipped out and cut open his head with a chair by throwing it at him.

Then he posted those photos on Facebook and 4chan and websites like that and told everyone that I was prostitute and a sick, bisexual predator that preyed on the mentally unstable.

I was shunned by everyone and I didn't come out of my house at daytime for a week, I changed to a nightshift at work and I ordered my groceries online and picked them up from my flat that I live alone in, pushing a note under the door for the guy saying thanks.

Since then I've been coming to the same bar late at night when there's no chance of seeing someone I know just to drink and drink and drink until I can't drink any more and then have a few shots and most nights I end up being given over to the small local hospital to be kept an eye on so that I don't die in my sleep from choking on my own vomit or something like that.

When I wake up I'm terrified of leaving and going outside during daytime, I have basically become a reclusive drunkard that is in constant danger of killing myself by accident, it's almost funny how stupid it is.

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  • Yours is a sad tale but now, the only best way is up. Go to AA again, get off Facebook and get into therapy. You can recover your life. Good luck.

  • That is tragic ??; I hope you find some peace and love!

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