I love my boyfriend. He's a wonderful man and I'm lucky to have him... he's understanding, empathetic, caring, faithful, humorous, wise... everything I've ever wanted in anyone. Whenever we spend time together, I am on cloud 9 and feel utter bliss. Honestly, I've never clicked with someone the way I do with him and he feels the same way.

The only thing is... he barely has time for me. He is busy with family, work, duties, and his hobbies. His mom -- who he supports because she can't -- frequently asks him to go on errands for her.

He makes an effort to spend time with me every day and I appreciate that, but the time we have together is so limited -- probably 30 minutes to an hour at most. Whenever I express these concerns to him he gets overwhelmed and shuts down, saying any free time he gets he gives to me (which is an exaggeration), so I do my best to keep it to myself and get over it, but I can't anymore.

I feel selfish for feeling this way when he's the perfect guy for me. I just wish he gave me more time, and his UNDIVIDED attention during those times. I wish he didn't make me feel guilty for wanting that. Maybe if he did, I wouldn't crave it so much.

My mind keeps telling me to break up with him because it's been 6 months of this and nothing has changed, other than the way I react to it. (Before I was very vocal and he would get upset. We 'argued' nearly everyday. Now, after a lot of self-reflection, I don't say anything, allow the emotions to subside, and get over it). I've changed a lot these past few months... but what hasn't changed is my need for his time. It really makes me feel unappreciated, despite what he says.

I want the best for him. He does have a lot going on, so me being needy probably stresses him out more. I always say if it's too much we should break up. It sucks knowing you add to your SO's stress... but he refuses and reassures me.

I' don't know what to do... Is there something I can do to change how I feel about it? Is there a way I can speak to him about this without offending him? Or is it a lost cause? I'm not ready to give up, but this is getting tiring. I'm tired of missing him and wanting more and more.

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  • There's a n***** in the woodpile here.. EVERY man needs sexual release with a dame, that is not in the equation here & you claim you 2 haven't been down that road yet.. All I know is that he is releasing his s**** in a gal's v***** somewhere.. It may be yours someday although it isn't now..

  • It seems to me like you've found a really good guy who just has alot on his table right now. Also, you seem to be a very passive and self centered person, and that personality trait seems to be squeezing you out of his life. Why don't you insist on getting more involved with his family, because that will make both of you that much closer. Why don't you try running the errands for his sick mother so that this is one less commitment that he has to worry about? Why don't you make it a point to get involved with his hobbies? I'm sure he would like that and your involvement would mean that you'd be spending more time together. FYI, at some point, just lying in bed all day with your legs spread, just isn't enough for most guys. If you want this relationship to last than you'll need to become more than just his s** kitten. You'll need to become the best friend that he's ever had.

  • I appreciate your answer, other than the lying in bed with legs spread part. That was uncalled for. We haven't even had s** yet. However, I do agree that I could offer to help with his family more. Thank you. :)

  • Have a heart to heart with your mate and let him know that you should be his first consideration, and that you need more of his time. If he refuses, then be sure to get couple's counseling so that he better understands you. Good luck.

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