I'm married, have a kid and after 10 years I still think about hi
I just want to spill this thing that is tearing me apart and making me a half-human.
I met him ten years ago. We were so in love, I was so happy, I couldn't believe that this is happening to me. To good to be real. Two years after we met he left to study in Amsterdam.
So our lives continued. I met a boy, I got pregnant. Now I have a beautiful kid and I'm married but I'm not happy. Yes, I love my kid with all of my heart, he is my everything and I wouldn't change a thing in my past just to have him.
But this boy..... God.... It has been 10 years, we still write to each other sometimes. I want to tell him something more and I know that he wants to tell me something too, I can feel it... But I'm married with a kid after all.
Everything is just so f***** up.... Should I follow to where my heart leads and fulfill my dream, the only thing that movies teach or should I keep this family together on the price of destroying myself completely?
I'm just afraid of becoming another Anna Karenina...
The heart and the sense are in such fight that I keep finding it hard to breathe day after day....
Is there a possible happy ending? Sometimes I watch these movies and I just think that the only happy ending that I would wish for myself is to see him again just even one more time in my life. It could be just a sneek peek, without him even realizing that I'm watching him.