No work

I got fired from my job about a month ago due to "downsizing" but haven't told my wife. I still keep the same routine of waking up, showering, and leaving the house at the 8:15 every morning and come home to see her at lunch at 12:00 and come home to her at the end of the day around 6:00. The only difference is that instead of going to the office, I sit in the park all day and pretend to read newspapers or if it's rainy I'll sit in a coffee shop pretending to work on my lap top even though I'm usually just staring at a blank screen and daydreaming. I got nothing to live for and have given up on even attempting to look for a job. I keep a piece of paper in my wallet that I pull out and obsess over as I slowly subtract the little left of my savings on a daily basis. I am calculating when the money will completely run out. What then? I don't know yet. I know my wife will leave me as soon as I tell her but I don't really even care about that anymore. I don't let on that anythings wrong in front of my wife. I even make up stories about what happened at the office each day and sometimes come home late telling her that I got stuck at work because I had to close on a big deal. She doesn't work and hasn't since we've been married. She is a good housewife, cooking, shopping and cleaning the whole nine yards. But I think I'm done with this domestic life. Sitting and thinking all day for these past few weeks has made me think I want to just live as a homeless man and sleep on the streets and beg for money to get by day to day. I no longer want a mortgage, car payments, and a wife who buys the most frivolous things. I also think about having an affair just so she will leave me and I won't have to break the news to her that the money's all gone. The other thing crossing my mind lately is laying down on the train tracks to meet the twelve o' clock special.

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  • I am going financially down. i need more money. i never have enough lately paying for courses that sarina russo, bowi or poeta or all the people who assaulted me like rick and katey and bec or joyce or heaps of others should have paid for. why can't the govt force them to pay for some of my medical bills and education and holidays seeing they had so much fun abusing me. ken should pay and rsl and leigh and anyone who wronged me should help pay the taxation should make rape victims and child abuse victims get discounts on so many things its so are we supposed to get ahead. these people are theives, it makes me sad that god allows them to get away with it and why cant they be punished so I can see them suffer and forced to pay me back. well I don't feel entitled I just feel its the art of being human which I was never allowed to have seeing others suffer and forced to help who they abuse. this is no longer gonna be my problem but their problem.

  • So, you built the life everyone told you was the right one to build, and it sucks. Move on. If what you're doing doesn't work for you, do something different. Now's your chance to try a new direction. Giving up now is like deciding you hate ice cream after you tried one flavor.

  • It's more like I tried one flavor of ice cream and found out I was lactose intolerant.

  • So try the pie instead :)

  • "Girl on the train"

  • What the h*** is ur wife doing to keep the ship afloat cause she sounds useless

  • Hi. This is sad. Have you tried looking for work? I bet you could find something that might at least hold you over.

    Here's a couple other things. If your wife would leave you because you've hit a hard patch - she's not worth having. Leave her first. Sell the house. You could probably keep the car if you sell the house, but if not let that go too. Maybe she will take it and assume the car payments. Get a simple job, and a small place - maybe a basement apartment or a bachelor somewhere. Simplify your life and rebuild from there to make it something you do want. You're severely depressed. You need to act now on some of these changes before your savings completely run out.

    Talk to your wife. Maybe you're wrong. Maybe she will have your back, and maybe she will find work too. Maybe together you two can rebuild. Even if it means selling the house and getting the mortgage off your back.

    Whatever you do, please do it do not go near those train tracks. People get laid off. Life throws curve b****. I think you have a lot of worth still and you need to live.

    Good luck <3

  • Everything will be fine if you invest your time in searching new job. Good luck and God bless you...

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