Inappropriate Kiss

My husband and I had a small dinner party last night with another couple, Mike and Julie. We've been friends for 15 years, but they recently moved back to town, so we hadn't seen them in a long time. The food was great, the weather was perfect, and we had a great time. Everything was fine until the end.

As Mike and Julie were getting ready to leave, Mike went out to his car to take back some leftover food. My husband was chatting with Julie by the door. He gave her a brief hug (not a problem) and then (big problem, imo) gave her a kiss on the mouth that included some tongue. Julie looked surprised, but smiled and simply said, "Whoa." It was also clear that she kind of kissed back, albeit reluctantly.

I saw everything from about 30 feet away, as I was watching from the kitchen. I didn't say anything at first, because I was blown away by how inappropriate my husband was. When Mike and Julie were gone, I lit into my husband and asked, "Can you tell me what that was about?" He was like, "What?" I told him that he knew damn well "what."

We argued for about an hour. He said it is no big deal to give a good friend a goodbye kiss. I said it's no big deal if it is a quick peck on the cheek, but that it was totally horrendous to slip her tongue. I made him sleep on the couch, but even today, he still feels like he did nothing wrong.

I'm beyond mortified. I don't know whether to talk to Julie about this, or tell Mike about what happened (he was outside at the time), or simply let it go. I don't think it is a stretch that my husband has the hots for Julie, which really upsets me.

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  • My situation was similar. One New Year's Eve a few years ago, my husband and I were at a big party at some friends' house. Just before midnight, I went looking for him after he'd been MIA for over an hour. I searched their house and couldn't find him. Walked out to their pool house and in one of the back rooms he was kneeling in front of a woman I'd never seen before, eating her s***** as she sat in a folding chair smoking a cigarette. She saw me but never moved to cover herself or alert him: she just smiled at me, like she had been waiting for me to walk in and find her with my husband. He later said she had come on to him like crazy and he didn't even know her name. I kicked him out of the house, but later on let him back in. I lived to regret it, because just 5-6 weeks later, I caught him with the same woman again, except he was up her ass this time. I divorced him. My point? Don't be blind. Learn from my mistakes. Men are s***. So is your husband. So is Julie.

  • Even if your husband isn't already f****** Julie, he's f****** somebody. Bet on it. That behavior indicates a relaxed attitude about relationships outside his marriage. Hire P.I. and have him followed. My guess: he has another "Julie" somewhere else.

  • I'd call Julie and ask her straight up if she's bopping your husband. It could be that she was just shocked/surprised. What you do know is that your husband is majorly attracted to her. He wants into her pants, and you need to keep them separated permanently.

  • Holy cow, another soap opera in a confessions forum. What is it, another takeoff on "the Edge of Night"?? Somebody writes a bait story & let it fly!!
    uh, No thanks. I like General Hospital better.

  • I watched the guy from another couple greet my wife that way, and she let him. It made me so h****. I still get hard thinking about it today, 10 years later.

  • Yeah, they're f******.

  • I think hubby has two girls.
    I think you should accept that and invite her to live with you.

  • Your husband owes you an apology. He should also hand over his phone to you, so you can see whether he has been texting Julie on the side. Something is not right. It could be that her mouth is not the only place where he's given her some tongue.

  • I guessing hubby and Julie are already f******. Otherwise Julie would have shown hubby the back of her hand.

  • Have to agree - just saying 'whoa' is so far from normal when some random sticks their tongue down your throat. Much more is going on, her husband needs to know.

  • I agree completely with ^this^ observation. Julie underreacted to his advance. She didn't say "whoa" because she wanted him to stop: she said "whoa" because she knew you were watching and he either didn't know that or he didn't care.

  • Whatever you do, do NOT tell her husband: he will blame her, at least tangentially, and there will be damage in their marriage, even if only a bruise. You need to evaluate your situation, your husband's intentions, the likelihood of his straying again (whether with Julie or someone else), and whether or not you can forgive him for this incident (if it was only one), and then make your own decisions about the future. Keep a close eye on your man for any signs of further trouble. BTW: tongue kisses are NOT acceptable goodbye kisses, no matter what your husband says about the matter. Yes, that was him straying, even though there was no s**. Be careful: your husband is on the prowl.

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