New Year's Downer

I've been dating this beautiful woman for about 3 months. I'm so in love with her it's beyond words. I've never felt like this about another person. She's in grad school, super smart, perfect body, and we've had virtually no problems until yesterday, when we went out for a New Year's celebration. We're both 24.

We went downtown to a club and no fewer than five guys came up to her and said things like "Haven't seen you in a while," or "How can I get back in touch with you," or "I loved hangin' with you," or "I really miss you." Two were Hispanic, one was white, and two were black. (We're white, btw.)

I asked her who these guys were, and she admitted that a couple were former boyfriends, but she wouldn't really elaborate beyond that. She got really defensive when I said "So you like black and/or brown d***?" She told me to shut up and get over it, that she loves me only, but that I was being a drunken fool.

We left early and rode home in near silence. She was upset, I was upset, but I still asked her "Did you s**** all of those guys?" She said she wasn't going to talk about it, and made me sleep on the couch when we got to her apartment.

We argued about it more the next morning. I asked her how many guys she's been with, whether she did threesomes or orgies, how many times she's had DP, etc., but she was fighting with me all the way.

I told her that I want to marry her, but she needs to be honest. She said, "I'm not looking to get married today, a-hole" and that just makes me more upset. She should have been more accepting and welcoming. I told her that I didn't appreciate that she's hiding things from her past from me.

Am I justified in being upset?

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  • You would not have known any of this if you had not met the 5 guys she played around with. You can't change the past or your girlfriend. I'll bet you never knew she was with black or hispanic guys. If all of that bothers you maybe you should walk away, if you don't, you will be looking over her shoulder for the rest of your life.

  • Stop asking stupid, immature questions about her past s** life. Some of those guys may have turned her inside out on their d**** and notched her on their belts, but she's yours now, and you are the guy smashing the h*** out of those memories every time you take her doggy. Be thankful for the opportunity, you idiot.

  • You sound racist.What if she tried black or brown c*** you insecure f***. She’s probably fixing to dump your ass real soon for tryin to bring up her past.
    You’re never going to get over the fact that she gave that tight white P**** away to blacks and browns. You already sound like you are too good for her and controlling.

  • Sounds like she is being very defensive towards her past relationships. What is she trying to hide? First, you never ask women if they s***** a guy off. All of us have been with ex girlfriends, boyfriends, wives, lovers at some point in our lives so you know the answer to that question. Although she should not be as upset as you have described. Secondly, put the beauty and the b******* behind you as it looks like it's not going to work out with her. Appears she has her mind made up that she has a fondness for dark meat. Thirdly, do not marry this woman!

  • Yeah you’re being a little b**** about her past. You have her now, and there’s nothing you can do about her past. Grow up little boy, grow up.

  • No. It's none of your damn business, because it's in the past. In so far as taking you to a club where she knew you might both encounter her former boyfriends - If she did that to see how you would react - You failed. However if there are many clubs downtown, and your choice of this one was totally random, then yo girl is a s*** bro, or perhaps , she just wanted to equip herself with the full 'range of skills' to satisfy her chosen lover. Wasted on you, they are.

  • Gawd no your not justified. Her history is her business unless she wants to share it with you. You have known her 90 days and now some stupid reasoning in your mind says she needs to answer to you? You don't own her Junior.

  • You get a pass for being young and dumb. A jealous guy is not a turn on. Then you pouted in the car. Also not very attractive. Saying every wrong thing you could have possibly said came out of your pie hole. You have known her 3 months and now drilling her on her past history. Asking her to marry you after knowing her 3 months and on top of that on the heels of a blow out.
    Now you have learned exactly what not to do and say the hard way. You possibly will kiss and make up for a short while but you just planted doubt in her mind about you.

  • You don't sound like a nice guy but get away from her sooner than later. It would be best for both of you, imo.

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