Scolded by my mom

This is a true story and not even a single detail was made up. I have a fetish on pantyhose, especially shiny ones and open-toe high heels. This fetish was accidentally provoked by no one else but my mom. I was about 12 years old when I saw my mom putting on her pantyhose and high heels before going to work. Her bedroom doors weren't completely closed, so I stayed and watched. I immediately felt strong excitement and tingling sensation in my stomach. I also felt shame, but couldn't resist it and had to ** to what I just saw. My mom loved wearing pantyhose and heels, even trough her 40's and 50's. Everyone thought that she was 10 years younger. Ever since the age of 15, I was often smelling and licking my mom's dirty pantyhose and ** all over her pantyhose and heels. I was careful enough hiding the traces for about 12 years. To be honest, I dream about having have a ** with my mom so bad, much more than with any other ** the planet. She divorced my father when I was 10 years old and remained single ever since.
Later on, I had a girlfriend, but the epitome of my sexual desires was still my mom. I was so afraid to ask my mom for **, because I suspected that she would freak out, since ** was a big taboo for her. Her looks and style were giving a completely false impression because she looked like a perfect **, a hottie. Important thing is that she only looked that way, but was sexually constrained. So, I continued doing the next best thing - smelling, licking and masturbating all over her pantyhose and heels. One day she caught me. She found her spermed pantyhose and spermed heels that I was about to wash later on and return them where they belonged, so that she wouldn't figure it out. She was furious and scolded me. At first she thought that I was gay. That was completely false, since I'm 100% heterosexual. As I said, she was smart, very beautiful woman who dressed ** (never cheap or vulgar), but she was also full of boundaries and ** or even talking about it was a huge taboo for her. I was 27 years old when she caught me (she was 55) any I felt embarrassed beyond belief. Four years have passed since the incident and she still keeps her pantyhose hidden and her ** heels under a lock. I still want to have ** with her more than anything, but highly likely will never get it.