Wife cheats

I'm 37 and married with kids age 2 and 6, my wife is 32. I know my wife cheats cause I saw the messages and pics on her phone when it was unlocked several times and the fact that she always has an excuse when I attempt to make love to her. The men appear to be high value men who seem to be more successful than I and seem better looking than me, no h***. I've never been confident about myself and my body but I hide it pretty well. She likes to go out alone and we hardly do stuff together. She's distant of me and that prompted by suspicion. She doesn't know I know, at least I think so. Or she knows and doesn't care. I don't know when she started cheating and I'd be lying to say it doesn't bother me. I've tried to talk with her just in general about what she's feeling and try to re-ignite the spark we had but she's distant. I haven't confronted her yet about it and don't really know how and just feel demoralized to. After a few months of being roommates with my wife and taking care of the kids, I decided one day to go to the mall to get out of the house and reflect. I was walking around and I went into a clothing store and was speaking with a nice young girl, I think about 19-20? Not sure and I didn't ask her age, of course. I don't know why or what motivated me but I started flirting with her, she liked my flirting and flirting herself. After chatting for a few she said when she was getting off work and I said I'll come back. We met outside the store entrance and started walking and continued talking. I just felt a connection with her but in a public place I was worried about the stares if I kissed her. She's lovely and very bubbly and made me feel alive, even if for a short time. We stopped at the food court and I bought her dinner. We continued our little date flirting with each other. Her parents called asking when she would be home but she lied and said she was going to hang out with her friends. Her lying told me all I needed to know. I'm not saying it's right, but she actually cared about me, made me feel like I existed. I told her about my situation with my wife and she empathized and seemed to care. She was very nice and comforting about it and I tried hard to hold back the tears. She's so pretty and her eyes made me lose myself in them. I confessed how she made me feel and she kissed my cheek. I felt really attracted to her and I just spit it out bluntly and asked if she wanted to go to a hotel? She smiled and said yes and she followed me to the hotel. I got the room while she waiting in her car and texted her the number. We had s** many times and talked and hang fun together. I felt alive even though I was married. After a few hours her parents called asking where she was and so she had to go. After that we continue to meet up and have our flings. I realized how much I like younger women, I have so much fun with her. Not saying it's right but I feel alive and it is what it is my life.

Jan 19

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