The value of pain

I used to wonder when I heard about kids cutting. I thought why would someone cut themselves. Just seemed weird.

Fast forward a few years and I started to get stressed because the marriage was on the rocks. I had problems at work. Life seemed to be going down.

One day I was feeling depressed and just squeezed one of my nipples and found the pain was distracting and then when I let go a feeling of relaxation washed over me.

Being curious, read a bit of stuff on the internet. I read that pain from spanking can reduce headaches. I read that submissive personalities get into a comfortable mental state called sub space.

Discussed with wife. She was initially skeptical and was adamant that there was no way I was spanking her. I assured her that was not what I was meaning.

Since then I have bought some nipple clamps and use them when I am feeling stressed. I have found that too much use though renders the nipples numb and so I try to do it in frequently. It's actually and interestingly a bit addictive. maybe I am a m********?

One day I woke with a headache. Wasn't sure why. Was I getting sick? Was I dehydrated? Was it stress due to some up coming deadline? I wasn't sure and asked the wife to beat me with a belt. She was quite hesitant and eventually did a few half hearted licks with the belt. I pleaded with her to really hit me hard. She did and t was really really painful but afterwards a wave of relaxation just washed over me. No more headache and renewed energy and focus.

I checked my bum and there were welts and some blood from broken skin. I offered my wife to look but she said she was not interested. I put on several pairs of undies so as to absorb any blood.

Went off to work.

That evening, I said to her that it had worked great.

With time she has become more willing to whip me but only when I ask. I think I am submissive and would love her to be a dominatrix but thats not her. In the mean time, I have continued to use pain as a distraction from stress.

Jan 24

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  • I would rather be smothered with kisses than be whipped with a belt.
    If it makes you happy, who am I to judge?
    It's a fine line between pleasure and pain.
    I believe you have been abused in the past and having someone dominate you with punishment, most likely gives the abuser power over you.
    I think you like being dominated.
    I do not equate pain with love.
    If lashings of the belt ease you from stress and pain, i would want to get to the bottom of why this has this kind of effect on you?
    Perhaps it = salacious S**!

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