Old PUppy Love

It all started my freshmen year of high school. I met this guy online in a chat room. We started talking for a year, and I realized that I started falling for him. He started to tell me I Love You, and of course me being a stupid young teen I said it back. I really started to fall for this guy; problem was he was a) 7 years older than me, and b) lived in Canada. The fact that it was puppy love made me not care. We talked to each other every day. Every now and then he would tell me maybe we should stop talking because he couldn’t deal with the age difference. But what can I say I was HOOKED on this guy...

He said that he would wait for me. That when I turned 18 he would come down and visit me. That he would marry me and we would have kids. Stupidly I fell for it. Yes, I should have known that it was all lies but as I said I was a young teen and well stupid.

Me and Canadian guy stopped talking the beginning of the following year. Soon, I fell the most amazing guy. Funny enough it was the older brother of one of an old crush of mine that I met my 8th grade year. I met his older brother the summer before I went to high school. Anyways I never payed much attention to him at the time.

Well maybe half way through my sophomore year my old crushes older brother told me he like me. I was shocked mostly because we were complete opposites, but I gave him a chance.

- Fast Forward 2 and 1/2 yrs later -
Me and him are still together. I love him VERY MUCH. He means the complete world to me. Hes been there when my parents couldnt help me. I go to him when I need advice. I feel as if he is my soul mate. He is the only person Ive had s** with. Im 18 now, but I lost my virginity to him when I was 16. I can say that I regret losing my virginity so young, but I DONT regret losing it to him.

But the purpose of my writing this is because every now and then I think about Canadian Guy. I dont think of him the way I use to, but I do wonder what he is up to now. And sometimes I wonder what would have happened if Canadian Guy did come back?

Should I feel guilty for having this thought? Need advice

Jul 8, 2010

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  • It's absolutely normal. You're curious......Who wouldn't be? How old are ya now?

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