I am deeply obsessed with my therapist

I have been speaking to a specific therapist for over a year now. I have told her everything about myself, even my darkest, very ** up secrets. She has been my therapist since the worst events in my life, and so I view her as important to me, so much so that I feel a strong connection to her. I talk to her quite often and she is very friendly with me. I have started to develop an extreme obsession with her, ever since my partner died a year ago; I've been trying to learn everything about her, so that I can be closer to her, not to do anything bad, I just really like her. I have a photo of her that I look at frequently, and I have masturbated to the though of just talking to her, though I must be honest I feel guilty about it. She is almost 20 years older than me, since I'm 24 I don't think she would ever want to be with me, but I have always had an attraction to women much older than me since I was **, for certain reasons lol. I am planning on printing photos of her and putting the photos on my wall, and also making deepfake photos of her naked and in photos with me, I want to get a tattoo of her on me. Also, I very recently drove many hours to a place I saw her at in a photo and studying the photo for days, and I took a photo just like the one I saw her in. I want to tell her that I'm suicidal so that she treats me even better, or maybe cut my wrists and show her, so she acts like a second mom to me or acts sexual with me, but she might call the police on me. She has spoken in a sort of sexual way to me but maybe I'm just being delusional. I want her to know how much I like her but I'm afraid of being rejected. What should I do about my intense obsession, and attraction for her?

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