I sometimes wish that i wasnt here and

I sometimes wish that i wasnt here and i would disappear. i sit at the top of the cliffs near my house and look out to sea thinking about how if i just "slipped" the world would not be affected. Yes my family would be sad but the percentage of people affected would be minute, unnoticeable and so small in comparison to the rest of the planet. These thoughts cross my mind more each day at roadsides trainstations and in places with dangers all around. Everyday its like i fight to just keep safe. I dont no why these thoughts cross my mind , my memories of anything past an hour ago have disappeared i feel so alone without feelings things other than a constant l*** for death. But One guy keeps me here he is the only reason he doesnt know it i wish he knew how i felt for him he is my best friend i love him exstatically i couldnt live without him xxx

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  • I feel the way you do everyday of my life...will it ever stop, Maybe when I am truely happy, so i guess never....

  • Both of you have realized the harsh reality of life. I could sit here and tell you all the reasons your wrong, but it would fall on deaf ears. The root cause is clinical depresion. Why your depressed falls into two categories.

    1. physical/mental you are completely unable due to chemicals in your bodies unbalancing you mental state.

    2. pyschological something you have witnessed or been forced into has changed your normal thinking and reasoning.
    moving, unstable family, bad relationships, rape or abuse.

    you have to do some soul searching and accept one or the other. 2. you have want to get help, if your family wouldn't understand call a toll free help program there are litteraly thousands nationwide all free and anonymous...search the web.

    depression will not go away on it's own you don't grow out of it. Placing all your hope on one person will not solve your long-term issue, all your doing is prolonging the enevitable and unintentionally dragging someone else into your sickness. In reality if you really cared about him you would seek help for yourself now.

  • im 14 and I feel the same way every second of my pathetic lil life

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