Am I the only one turned on by Nazis?
I confess. I think Nazis are awesome. To the point of obsession. I can’t stop thinking about Nazis, reading about them, watching shows about them, listening to f****** music about them. It’s ridiculously obsessive. I can’t help it! I don’t know why I have to be this way! I just AM. I read half of Mein Kampf, for chrissake. Speaking of Hitler, I think he’s sexy. Sick, right? But I can’t stop how I feel. God, I would give anything to have been a N*** during World War II. I want to hate myself for this obsession but I can’t! I do hate that when I show an interest in WWII, people always go “You don’t actually LIKE that stuff, DO YOU?!” I say no, but the history is interesting. Which is true, but… I want to stand up and say “YES!! I CONFESS!! I LIKE NAZIS! I LIKE HITLER!! I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU THINK!!!!” I hate thinking about it all the time, though! Hitler this, Mengele that, Auschwitz this, Aryan that. I have dreams about all this s*** and I wake up wishing it were 1939. WHY do I have to be this way? I can’t even talk to anyone about this or they’ll call me racist, bigot, crazy. I don’t have any opinions on Jews, hahaha. I just f****** love Nazis.
I had an online girlfriend a couple years ago. We met in a chatroom and started talking because I was having some conversation with someone about Nazis (naturally they were completely opposed). Funny thing was, we became friends because we both liked Nazis. We went pretty far with that; I called her Eva and she called me Adolf. It sounds ridiculous, but it was one of the best times of my life. I could actually talk to someone else who felt like I did. But then, I fell into a depression and stopped talking to all my online friends, including her. This was a mistake and I regret it every day. By the time I went back on my Instant Messenger I was terrified she’d hate me for not talking for a long time. I never talked to her again. I f****** dropped off the face of the earth without a word to her. I confess that this has driven me crazy and I hate myself for it. I’m sorry, my Eva. I really did fall in love with you but I never told you, and I’m f****** stupid because of it.