I hate you

The only person who ever told me they loved me now hates me. But I don't care. Because I hate him.

We dated from last November to January and then I ended it because it just wasn't working. But then I missed him. He and I became best friends and in the meantime he had another girlfriend for about a month. During this time I confessed that I still liked him and he said that maybe someday we'd be together again.

And then he dropped a bomb on me. He said that he had a problem with cutting himself. His dad was so awful to him that he couldn't help it. I told him that earlier in the year, I'd had a problem where I always wanted to cut myself but never had. He made me promise never to do it and I made him do the same. But his girlfriend asked him who he liked better; her or me. He was so stressed out that he did it. So continued the cycle of him promising and then breaking the promise. I was so angry with him that I did it to myself. I told him, and he then did it again. We were pretty messed up but at least we had each other.

So then he and his gf broke up. He expected me to want to be together right away but I wasn't quite ready. Eventually we started dating again, from late march to early may. I ended it again. Because he was smothering me and I lived in constant fear of upsetting him and causing him to hurt himself. It just so happened that I liked someone else as well. He thought that this other guy was the sole reason for the breakup and hated him with a burning passion. He then told everyone I had "cheated" on him. I was furious because I had not acted on my feelings (comment if you would like to hear more. There is much, much more.)

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