Confessions of a 20 year old girl

Ok here I go. Well I'm a 20 year old female.
I was diagnosed a couple years ago with PCOS.
I've always been a chubby kid. But this condition has made it worse and now I'm obese. I find it really hard to lose weight. The most messed up thing about it is that I actually like exercising! I love getting on my treadmill and working hard till I sweat. But It's like I never lose weight. I even watch what I eat. Another messed up thing that comes along with having PCOS is that I don't have regular periods. I have to take an oral contraceptive everyday so my body can have regular periods. But it doesn't even end there. Another symptom of this f***** up condition is excessive hair growth. Yep.. I have hair on my chin, chest, b****, stomach, you name it. I shave, wax, pluck, bleach.. I go through a lot of trouble and I feel so disgusting. My self esteem is non existent. I didn't even mention the worst part.. I might not even be able to have kids lol. I love kids. My dream is to have kids. And theres a possibility that's not even possible. I don't even feel like a women..more like a disgusting walking train wreck. It's not like anyone would want to have a kid with me anyway.. I'm fat..people just look at you and assume you f***** yourself over. I didn't. I f****** try so hard to be normal but I cant. I know no guy will ever give me a chance either. I actually a really nice girl. I'm funny, caring, fun, and loving. But it doesn't matter in the end now does it. I'm f***** for life.

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  • I think you're beautiful. Your dream is so beautiful. I really admire you. You shine like 10,000 stars. You just need to realize it.

  • I was diagnosed with PCOS at 24 but had the symptoms for years before the diagnosis. Consider yourself lucky that you know what's wrong, and don't just assume you're a fat, hairy freak of nature like I did. Despite thinking of myself as repulsive, at 22 I met a wonderful man who I am marrying next year. There's no cure for PCOS but it doesn't have to ruin your life.

  • Hun, I have PCOS and I'm a bigger girl. Its almost 3 yrs since I was diagnosed and this year quite possibly at my heaviest I've been on more dates and had 1 of the best years of my life. Don't let it get you down I'm sure you are beautiful and will find a guy who loves you no matter what. The right man will love u as a size 2 or at a 22 he wont care. I have my ups and downs but I've made it this far and plan to keep my head up.

  • Lots of people have PCOS and have kids! My friend is about to have her 2nd! I have PCOS and although I had weight loss surgery to lose the weight I still have the hair growth so I can relate to your feelings there! I got married to a wonderful man when I was 313lbs though...now I am 143lbs and still married. Life is not all bad!

  • Thank you for your response i feel a little better knowing im not alone, I guess I will hope for the best that I'll find wonderful guy like you did :)

  • It's really not that bad. I have it also. I felt the same way you did, but I got over it. I have a kid on the way in two months. Me and my boyfriend plan on getting married soon. I do really hate the hair growing everywhere, but I just try to stay on it.

  • Thank you to the second comment too. I feel less alone now that I know It's not just me going through this. And congratulations! :)

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