Sad Daughter

Last night we had to tell our 15 yr old daughter that she had to break up with her BF. Her father found messages that her and her BF were drinking every time they would get together. Then have been together for one yr, go to different schools and see each other less often then she'd like. Anyway he is away for the summer in South America with older step-brothers and his father, parents are divorced. My husband fears the fact that his family is showing him a good-time and could possibly come back with a sexually transmitted disease. Is this a stretch? Yes, but what is a parent to do. Her BF is a smart boy, but let's face it with out his mom with him in a different country, boy's will be boy's.

This is her first BF and I'm positive not her last. The blame is all on us for this break-up and for good reason too. But of course she doesn't see it this way. She is smart enough to know that this will not her last and that the right guy for her will come along, when the time is right.

How did I help her, through this ear-mark in her life?


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  • Fail.

  • W****

  • her dad should rape her to convince her what a w**** she is!
    bet she learned it from her mom

  • It's a good thing to set rules for your children and to know what they're up to. But you also have to allow her to grow up. So your rules have to adjust as she ages, and trust that she'll make the right decisions. She may still get mad or think something isn't fair, but someday she'll understand. Personally, I would rather know who my daughter is dating then have her do anything in secret. The underage drinking is not okay. Sure, lots of teens do it, that doesn't make it okay.

    Forcing her to end a relationship will most likely cause her to rebel..agree with the other commenter. Talk with her, tell her what your rules are for dating and what the consequences are for breaking them.

    Since she is/was already dating this guy, consider 16 as a good age for her to begin to date boys. Maybe even allow her to see the boy when he returns with some firm rules in place.

    And even if you don't want to know or believe she is sexually active, get her on birth control. STD's are everywhere, so thinking that the boy is going to come back with something outside of where he lives is stretching it. Get your daughter on birth control asap. As much as you don't want to know or think that your child could be sexually active, it's about protection and prevention. It's not about giving a young person permission to have s**, it's protecting them and knowing that they are aware and safe. ..

  • You said it, "she is smart enough to know that this will not her last and that the right guy for her will come along, when the time is right." Let her be smart enough and decide. Allow her to be mature about it.
    Boys will always be boys, but I wouldn't do it this way. I would talk to her, not tell her she "has to break up with him". This might make her react in ways that would be worse.

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