15 Years of unhappiness

I have had my step son for 15 years and I have always went through the motions to keep the peace. Now that he is graduated I have become very aggressive about his laziness and unwilliness to pull his weight in the house. Unfortunately, my wife always intervenes and sides with the ss leaving me isolated and outraged. I started looking for a place to vent because all I can think about is punching this ungrateful kid in the face.

I have always made a moderate living, we live a nice upper middle class lifestyle and I have always seen him as a guest.... Not family. Maybe that's not fair but all I ever wanted in return was a display of appreciation. He drives my cars, uses my Internet, watches my cable, eats my food and what do I get out of it..... He sits at a computer or video game for 12 hours a day, rarely completed his chores and when he does it is s***.... Stays up all night j********** to p***... Sleeps til 2 and 3p, and every time I turn around, he has my wife's debit and credit

Just a point to all the comments I read above.... The spouse is just as guilty. I think they over compensate out of guilt or something. My wife is definitely the reason I can't get the results needed. Physically, I could snap his little punk ass in half, but my wife takes fights far beyond my comfort level so I back down (she has no fear of consequences and would not hesitate to destroy everything we have.... physically, emotionally, and monetary). I am at the point that I am ready to get rid of them both.

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  • Your SS sounds like he has no motivation of any kind, which is really sad. It sounds like you both have enabled him to do just what he's doing now, nothing. Maybe his mother moreso, but you are there too. Will he be attending college in the fall, or sitting on the couch more? I do think you care. You care about your sanity, your marriage and little about your ss - although it's coming out in anger and resentment. Instead of going to your wife and getting angry with her, reason with her. Try speaking to her and say that you're worried for him..how is going to get married or get a job? He needs some toughlove. It's a disservice to him to coddle him. Considering he has nothing, make some goals with him to enroll in college or get a PT job. Insist that he pay rent. It's time. Suggest that the two of you go to counseling so she can get a different perspective. If she knows you don't like the son, she won't do anything to change it. She needs to let go. And don't make her choose, because you will lose in the end. Good luck!

  • Man you need to get rid of them both quickly.He is graduated,you have done your part..better than biological dad am assuming.They have basically used you and have no feelings or respect for you.If u have received or earned no respect or appreciation by now,you never will. Just go and enjoy your life.I tell u this because I am experienced in life,educated and work in a mental health hospital and I know what an talking about.
    A buddy I work with has helped his wife raise a daughter for years.She got married not that long ago.His son lives out of state.He took the son home and when he came back,his wife had changed locks and thrown his belongings on the front lawn in the middle of the night.When he knocked to talk to her,she called the cops.He is now living in a motel. Dont be my buddy.

  • This reply is right on the money. He couldn't be any more right in what he's saying. FLUSH THESE TURDS FROM YOUR LIFE! Don't wait another day.

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