I had to do it but now I wish I hadn't

I had a five month affair with a guy I was madly in love with but I could tell that he and his girl were getting closer so I told my friend about the affair and she told his girl about the affair so I could keep my hands "clean" of the break up. I hoped he would stay with me but he stopped talking to me and I haven't heard from him since they broke up. I'm heartbroken and all I want is him back.

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