A secret Lover

I had a boyfriend who is married with 1 son. He separated from his wife 2 years ago before we've met. And had file their annullment case last 2013. Times very fast, just surprise one morning i fall in love with him. We are only 3 months on but the love that i feel and happiness i never been felt before. But, after 1 month the wife have a hint that my boyfriend is already having me. The girl still love my boyfriend i dont know the real story about their separation before but I have ask my boyfriend before if he didn't love his wife he said he dont have love anymore. Because whats happening in their is a shotgun marriage. The girl was always in the house of my boyfriend before thats why my boyfriend tempted having s** with him even if he dont love her. He tried for 2 years but didnt work. My boyfriend begging me now to have a deep understanding and patience about his status while the annullment is on process. In short, we are a secret lover while his annullment is not over. Because the girl is very desperate to find any evidences just to back up her counter affidavit in the court. I know there is no mother want a unsuccessful relationship since they jave a son. But my boyfriend never get back to his wife even if i broke up with him. Now, i find hard because we are a long distance relationship and we had only limited time to text and call. And i always notice that my boyfriend had a white lies. He said he do that in order for me not to worried not to keep secret for a reason. I need your help huys to enlight me whats the best things to do. I need an advice and opinion hope tou could help me.thank you


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  • He said.. They are not living in the same roof. What he always insist is... If the girl found out and had enough evidence that we are lover, this can be use for the counter affidavit of their annullment in the court. He said we will keep our relationship first while waiting for their annullment approval. Since the girl still chasing at him and dont want annullment. The girl had won their cases for conjugal property of their house. Thats why the girl always in their house but not sleeping there at night. But the siblings of the girl is sleeping in their house and always watched my boyfriend if he holding his fone if he texted or talking in the fone. And he always insist that he protected his case in the court because he dont want to lost his annullment in the court. That's why he only can call and text if no one is around. My question is.. There is a conflict if the girl found out that we had relationship and can use these in the court? (*divorce is not available in our country, only annullment and legally separated.

    We always fight because he insist that those reasons. My point is he can find ways to reached me up but effortless. And the girl and her sibling topping the fone of my boyfriend if he's not around. My boyfriend told me also that his lawyer advised him to be open to side of the girl to get some information. And what i cannot understand to him is.. He cannot text me or call me for how many days and night. And he do that repeatedly. In fact, now is our monthsary but he's out of knower. Also, i have ask him to give me a copy of their annullment, conjugal property and the custodial property. He got anger at me he said i never trust him etc etc. I always told him also that he will show to me and let me feel that i have a assurance while waiting for their annullment but he said sorry because he find hard for both parties. Thats why he had lack of time for me.. We have only communication monday to friday at daytime but night and weekends he disappear.

  • Well regardless of if it's an annulment or divorce, he is still unavailable. And with the wife's siblings, there are even more people involved. You ask what to do: 1. End it and walk away now before you invest any more time. Or 2. Do nothing and do as you've been doing. You can't really complain. You can't expect more The B.S. is right in front of you. And again..if you think his wife is a nightmare now...just wait. You have no idea what happens between a husband and his wife. You just hear what he says. He obviously did something, because she's is bent on making him pay. I say run.

  • Anytime a relationship starts out as a secret or is kept a secret, there's a good chance it won't last. Really, what do you have to hide? This is all him. And because of this, you have every right to question if your bf is really telling you the truth. Has he really filed for divorce? Are they still living under the same roof? He could very well be married and just cheating on her. If they did in fact file for separation or annulment, it wouldn't matter if he was seeing you..there would be a date listed as the date of separation. Meaning they would be leading separate lives at this point. You shouldn't have to live your life in secret because this guy isn't being truthful. His white lies are his and he shouldn't drag you down into his web. You didn't sign up for that bull s***. It sounds like you're wanting an honest and monogamous relationship with no games, and this guy can't deliver. What should you do? Follow your gut and intuition. Even if you have feelings for him. Lead with your head, not your heart. I'm not sure I would even trust him if he presented divorce papers.. those could be easily printed and manipulated. I would go over to his house and see if there is any evidence of her still living there. But really, as hard as it would be to do since you do have feelings. It may be best to just drop him. He's not available and not sure if you can truly trust him. One other huge thing to consider.. He has a very young child with a mother he is at odds with. Are you prepared to be a step mother? Because that child is part of the package, and more than likely..so is his baby mama.

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