I CONFESSED

I confessed awhile back about a scenario I had going on, my close friend whom I've known would always ask me for money and I signed his car note helped him out in any way I could to get a house,apartment etc. my fiancé would argue that I shouldn't let him work for my company in order to let him pay me back which my least concern was the money. I confronted him as to why he had hanged and backed away from me. A few weeks ago I let him work for my company in the construction industry. I'm a civil engineer also do surveying. I earn good money and always find ways to be self driven and be the best I can be for my family. Little by little he decided to pay me
Back every favor I ever did for him but in silence. My fiancé and I have been arguing lately because she complains I'm always working and never spend time with my 5 children. Keep in mind I'm young have a great career great future I focus on goals but now me and my fiancé are splitting for fault of my dear friend whom I decided to take and let him in again my fiancé argued that I chose a friend over family and what's right for "us" when in reality money and wanting it back from a pal is no concern. I came from nothing but my children will never come from nothing. My ex fiancé family is now bashing pointing saying I'm a bad guy when I've gave her everything and now I made a huge mistake as her family says by putting friends first before anybody when I've always helped my dear old pal in anything I can that's just the way I am my fiancé should've known now I'm in between do I bother to care what she says and change my ways or keep working and take care of my children and be the best dad I can be as well with splitting up but I noted with my fiancé if we ever split I'd fight for custody of my kids all her family is against me know which mind me saying I've also helped most of her family with jobs and economic status but then I'm the bad guy again here oh and btw I kept from my fiancé in a few weeks I go to New York for a huge civil project I have just closed which will bring money to the table like my fiancé wanted but idk if I should confess in full to her just yet my children are my world so are friends and family I helped out a long time buddy he wants to do good my fiancé has gone totally ignorant towards the subject when all I did was help him and not take her side because he wanted to do what's right and pay back every penny I ever lent when I'm not really worried about the money now I'm worried about me lying to my fiancé about my business trip but also having to deal with her family pointing fingers keeping my kids away from me and me wanting to fight for full custody of my kids oh btw it's been 1week since my fiancé decided to move out of our home and take my children with her .. Any advice I'm really beginning to loose my slow temper and mind at the same time in my career it's a great opportunity to travel to NY but I also have disagreements with the mother of my children and her family disagrees with me. But my dear old pal just wrote me a 3,000 dollar check in advance which means he's putting an effort to do what's right...

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  • I really don't see how there'd be anything wrong with helping a brother out, I think it's damn noble. That being I think it's pretty important to spend some time with your children, seems like it'd be a damn shame to let them grow up without knowing who they are

  • It's interesting how things change. Good for your friend for restoring your faith in him and him making an effort to begin to pay you back. As for your exfiance - it sounds like there could be more that made her up and leave then just you helping your friend. Sorry, that it happened. But in hindsight, guess you know now instead of years from now. You still have children to coparent, so you two will be forever linked but you are now free to loan or not loan money as you see fit. Definitely, hire a lawyer so you can make sure your custody arrangement are worked out. As for her family, they will probably side with her. Ignore them, they'll say what they're going to say. You don't have any control over that. Just let it go. Concentrate on your priorities -- your children. As for the trip to NY, as nice as it is to be honest and not keep secrets in a relationship - seeing as how your fiance is now an ex, not sure if it's really her business now where your job is. However, it will be a concern if you are fighting for custody and you do not disclose this in the beginning. But then again, you can say it's a business trip. But you two aren't married, and if you are not common law (check the laws in your state), you would not owe her anything more than child support.

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