Struggling right now

I think I might have to end my 3 1/2 year relationship with a man I still love to pieces. We have struggled the last few months with him changing jobs to bar work and buying a house, in May he said he doesn't know if he loves me anymore. The other week told me if he were to get married it wouldn't be to me, said I'm not the one but he 'doesn't hate me so it's ok'. Stupidly I still adore him and the though of sepersting breaks my heart, and would ruin my life in the town I live where I moved to, most of my friends are his friends.
He has been out the last 4 nights, and still isn't home from last night. I need to find the courage to ask, are you in love with me? But I can't face the inevitable NO. I don't know what the f*** to do. My health is suffering, so is my job, my social life, I worry even leaving the house sometimes.
I deserve to be respected, and valued, and to be with so one who is as invested as me, but right now I don't even respect myself. I don't want to waste my life but I don't want to ruin it even more. I'm not strong enough to deal with it. I hope and hope hope hope we can work things out but it's getting less likely by the day.

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  • Sweetie, he's seeing somebody else, and doesn't even care enough about your feelings to try and hide it. Move home, be single again. You are worth more than that. Sorry! You need to move home

  • I'm so sorry you're going through this. This isn't going to be easy. Do you have any friends that you can talk to? Or even a therapist? I want you to look at this from a different perspective. This is almost a blessing in disguise, because he's being honest with you about his feelings and his future. And yes, it hurts. But you are going to be more than fine. Start to find a new place to live. For your health, go and get yourself checked out and take care of you. Call up your girlfriends and go out..doesn't have to be to a bar. A dinner and a movie or something where you can have a good laugh. You said exactly what you want, need and deserve at the bottom of your post..a guy who respects you, values you and is as invested as you are. Your current guy is not. Don't waste any more time.

  • Wait...I think you have the answer already...

  • Leave now. Maybe it will bring him to his senses

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