I wish my step-daughter would go away

I'm 39 and have been married to a great guy for two years. It is my second marriage, and I love my husband very much. He is my dream come true. I do not have children from my prior marriage, but my husband has a daughter who is in high school and lives with us. I admit that my parenting skills are rough, but I try to do my best with my step-daughter. I'm at my wits end with her, though. I've had to go to the school to discuss with one of her teachers why she got an "F" in a class due to plagiarism, and another time I had to pick her up and bring her home for dressing inappropriately. I've talked to her about these things, but she gets defensive and breaks out the "You're not my Mom" card. She is defiant, failing most of her classes, and her circle of friends consist of largely boys who probably just want to use her. My husband has been of little help when it comes to establishing my authority in the house with her. My step-daughter truly burns me out. I can't wait for her to grow up and leave. If I never have to be around her again, I'd consider myself blessed.

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  • I have 3 kids and as each got into latter years of high school they went ferral. So that's normal.

    You and new hubby have to be absolutly 100% totally in agreement on anything to do with his daughter. It is quite possible that in addition to the usual teenage hormonal rebellion she is also jealous of you taking her father away from her or maybe she feels that you are responsible for her mom leaving or at least cutting off a dream of her mom coming back.

    If you and hubby are not 100% in agreement then I would suck it up and go his way. I would also though not go to the school on his behalf. His daughter his duty.

    On the specifics of failing because she plagerised. Good on the school. Support the school.

    Sent home for dressing inappropriatly - support the school.

    Friend who are boys who just want to use her - absolutely. Boys think constantly about s**. But what to do? Gets back to you and hubby being 100% in agreement. Me personally, I'd give her a pack on condoms and tell her that given her rebellious nature what she does is her responsibility. I'm sure she know s** makes babies, STD and aloneness. maybe she does not realise that once her man has had s** he will move onto his next conquest.

    What I would like to do with her though is send her to a private school with a uniform and make her wear that uniform mon-fri except when she is in bed. Hire a tutor to help with homework. Make her do sport and beat her for diobedience. But hey thats just a frustrated dad.

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