Inappropriate Xmas Gift

For the last year, my husband and I have had a mutual friend living with us. She was going through a tough time, so we let her stay with us. We've known her for years, and there have been no issues since we invited her to stay. She pays her rent, helps around the house, and even drives our son to and from school everyday. She has been a model roommate.

As a family, we are at the point where we don't really do major gifts during the holidays anymore--maybe something small, but that is about it. On Christmas we exchanged a few things, a token gift or two for each of us. I was severely disturbed by what our friend gave my husband.

Our friend gave my husband something called a Tenga Flip. We both looked at her and said, "What is this?" She said it was a masturbatory aid, and that she got it for him as a joke. I did not think that it was funny at all.

I asked her, "Why do you think he needs one of these?" She told me to "lighten up" and that it was a gag gift. I said, "It is a little disturbing that you gave this to MY husband." She again said it was a joke and that she didn't mean any harm by it.

I started to get upset, but my husband cooled me out, by saying it was okay, etc. I think he thought the gift was no big deal, but then again, he is a guy who thinks between his legs. I'm still so upset about the whole thing that I want to kick her rear to the curb. I'm upset.



  • newest
  • oldest
  • most replies
  • most popular
  • I think you need to take it in stride..No big deal.. I used to do a similar thing with my hot older sister. We've always had a great relationship, and nothing, especially sexual, was off the table. One year, she got me a flashlight that opened up and was a v*****, and, the same year, I got her a tiny tank top that pumped up by air and had the words "Look At Me!" on the t***. It was all in fun, and nobody really asked questions or complained. Too bad if they did.

  • Lol I'm the same with my brother :-)


  • Lol!!

  • After reading these comments I can't believe how many people go straight to "she is up to no good" "get her out of your house!" Have you had any suspicion before this gag gift that she has any feelings for your husband other than being his friend? Have you thought your husband might be sexually attracted to her at anytime she has been staying with you? A lot of friendships end over simple misunderstandings, but if you think your marriage is under threat of attack from her then by all means ask her to pack her bags. Although I will say if this is the reason and the fact your husband said its no big deal that you feel so threatened by her, I suspect there are deeper issues in your marriage and with her than a simple gag gift. Just my opinion, oh and so whomever down below in the comments doesn't have to ask , I'm a man.

  • Good for you, on your male gender! :)

  • If you read all the comments, someone replied to a comment with " I assume you are a man" I made sure to say I was a man in my comment so that person wouldn't have to assume :)-

  • Lol good for you x

  • I think I would be more okay with a good friend giving something like that to my husband, if she cleared it with me first. It's the surprise element that sounds like it unnerved you the most. I kinda get that.

  • Exactly my point is she would have cleared it with me. And if she was a good girlfriend with no bad intentions she should have/would have....

  • I agree

  • Pin a scarlet "A" to that Hester Prynne's chest and lock her in the stockade in the public square, Mrs. Chillingworth!

  • Ok, so this is a woman you have both been friends with for years. A woman who has been a great person helping out around the house and taking your son to school for a year now and you fly off the handle over a gag gift? Sure the gift may have been in poor taste , sure it may have been inappropriate for Christmas but lighten up, it was supposed to be a joke. You are completely over reacting. Do you trust your husband? Do you have any reason to think your marriage is in trouble? If not don't listen to the people telling you to throw her out. You got your point across to her that you didn't like the gift she gave your husband. If you throw her out now, it just shows you don't trust your husband.

  • If she was such a good friend she would have told her friend (his wife) if she'd be Ok with her giving her husband such an odd gift!

  • True

  • Omg b**** just have a sense of humor and laugh it off .. thats what you get for having another female living with y'all ..

  • She's not a b****, you're!!

  • There is something going on there and your right to question her and your husband. As a man I'm telling you that there is something sexual going on between them. Either she caught him j********** or he has mentioned it to her. If she feels that comfortable to give that to him with you their, it wouldn't surprise me if they were messing around or it's getting to that level. She may also want to see him use it. You nor I don't know but I know this. If you want to save your marriage and your home. Get several big black trash bags and get every last piece of her trash and pack it tight in those bags. Than escort her ass out of your house and tell your husband I double dog dare you to say a word or see that b**** again. He will think you for it later. Listen, unless you have been with the every min they have been together and you have watched them, you don't know what happens behind close doors. Listen to that voice or reason. It's GOD telling You the truth.

  • Or it could just be that the three of them are good friends and she thought they would just find it funny. Everything doesn't have to be gloom and doom , not every woman is a home wrecker and not every man screws around on his wife.

  • Well said

  • That IS an odd gift for a friend to give your husband. I'd be concerned, because it definitely shows that she thinks of your husband in a way that is more sexual than she should be doing.

  • Maybe she is just an adult woman that knows men j*** off and thought it would be a funny gift. She many have mistook her friends for people with a sense of humor. It doesn't me she want to s**** him.

  • I'm assuming you're a man!! I stand corrected, if you aren't 😉

  • Yes I'm a man , does that make my opinion worthless ? I'm not sure what I'm supposed to take away from your comment or is it just to shut down a conversation. " Don't listen to anything he has to say he's a "man" haha. Why comment if that's the best you can do?

  • You're entitled to convey your own opinion, like any other human being, regardless of gender. However, determining if your opinion is worthless or not, is a different matter.

    Happy New Year!

  • Why reply back, if your retort, is the best YOU can do! :)

  • And yet you still haven't explained what it is that I am supposed to take away from your, oh so well thought out comment . You pointed out how you assume I am a man, yes I am, so what is that supposed to mean? It was your comment ,it shouldn't be that hard for you to explain what you meant, right?

  • Happy New Year Man!

    Relax and don't fret over, petty s****!

  • No explanation NEEDED, you just "WANT" an explanation!

  • What? You are overreacting! Haven't you ever heard of a gag gift?? They are often sexual in nature but I think that it means nothing. You just sound like a prude who can't take a joke.

  • Perhaps, it was a joke. But there's a possibility, it wasn't. Don't assume otherwise. What may seem like a joke to some, may not to others.

    We're all individuals. With similar and different perspectives, don't forget that!

  • And if he keeps on saying that it is no big deal
    You need to start questioning what the f*** has been going on between the both of them...

  • Just because her husband implies it's not a big deal, doesn't necessarily mean, that something he's commuting adultery with their friend. By you stating this, could implement questionable doubts, in this woman's mind!!

  • Damn spell check!

  • I'm sure he said it was no big deal because its not. Wow take the gift for what it was a joke!

  • Perhaps

  • Seriously! Like periode !!OUT!!

  • Kick her out like right now!!

  • That's extreme!

  • Somebody get cheated on?

  • No!

  • She needs to go!

  • Sounds like someone needs to get a sense of humor!

  • Sounds like, you understand nothing!!

Account Login
Is this post inapropriate?
Is this comment inapropriate?
Delete this post?