I hate my 17 year old stepson

I’ve never really liked him to begin with, he would throw massive fits when I met him (age7). I mean throw himself on the ground and scream- no matter where we were... stores when he wanted something, or just when he wanted to ride on his dad’s tractor. He stole his mother’s keys and tried to take her car for a ride- she was a horrible alcoholic who never paid attention to him or believed in discipline in any form.
He argued with me every chance he got- including how it was normal for people to sleep in their front yard- Macdonalds every night is healthy, and that his mom doesn’t make him use the toilet.
I was told by him and his mother that I “wasn’t allowed” to love him.
I was told by my husband and his family that I was too ** him because I didn’t think a 7 year old should be ** themselves when they didn’t feel like pausing a video game or getting out of the pool. I was told I couldn’t take away rates R movies from him when he acted them out on his sister- (whipping his 2 year old sister in the face after watching Ghost rider and terminator)
I spent all week cleaning his room once- 6 hours a day for 4 days- he completely destroyed it and I told him he had to clean it up a little and eat breakfast before going to his grandparents who lived next door. He stole his dad’s keys and ran out the door. He called me a ** under his breath and no one didn’t believe me.
He slapped me in the face when he was 12. After his mother died he would try to use emotional blackmail on me when he wanted something in the store “well my MOM would get it for me”
At this point I had whitnessed him physically assault my 2 year old daughter (smother her with stuffed animals when she was a baby and touching her outside her underpants when she was older) and I don’t think I could ever love him after that. It took me everything I had not to kill him that day. I didn’t tell my husband because he and his family have the kind of attitude that would make me murder them- and if I divorced him, I know they wouldn’t keep an eye on that or take him to therapy or prison... so I was ** stuck- I stayed to protect my kid and nothing but resentment has built since then.

He was 16 last year when I said I give up- I’m just not disciplining him anymore- and last year he got in the first fist fight in school since him Mom died- while his mom was alive it was a regular call from the school about him assaulting other kids- after I decided to stop grounding and disciplining him- his mouth got worst and the police were involved because of the fist fight. He had no job and we were expected to pay a $300 fine just weeks before Christmas. I had planned to get new floors for my living room with the job I had gotten and pay for Christmas for my kids with my husband’s income (which was significantly more than mine). I told my husband he needed to pay the fine and that if he paid it for him it was a deal breaker for the marriage because I had had it with him. My husband paid the fine and I didn’t speak to him for 3 months or sleep in the same room as him. His son was kicked out of school and I had to take off work so he wouldn’t go through my room (oh yeah- I caught him going through my room because he liked to ** off in my closet with my clothes- my husband and his family thought it was funny- like I said they’re ** up- they couldn’t understand why I would feel unsafe or violated)
So I’m home with a kid who talks about ** women, shooting up his school and gets in trouble with the law. He came home last night swearing at us because we didn’t let him in the house (he has his own key) he gave us bad information about when he would be home, he was swearing at us for not answering our phones, swearing at us because WE didn’t tell HIM where we were going or when we’d be home.
Today the trash was missing because he didn’t clean it out last night like I asked- he just left it in the garage.
The sink was full of dishes (we have chores for all the kids once a week that need to be done by 12pm Saturday). Everyone’s chores should take 30 minutes to a half hour.- he claimed to have been working on them for 5 hours and yet not a single thing was done. Long story short- he’s 17, and it turned into a screaming match and I think my shoulder is dislocated again...
He left for work around 4 and the sink is still full of dishes...
I hate him and I want out of the marriage so I will NEVER have to see him again