I deserve a spanking
I am just full of guilt. Everyday I am full of guilt. Everyday I remember things I don't want to remember. I recall familiar faces I hurt, certain events that I regret, and think of possible future scenarios where I see them again and get laid into by them.
I know what I have done, and I am struggling inside to free myself from this guilt. I can't move on from it; no matter how many times I say it's too late to do anything about it now.
I hurt them, I manipulated them, I broke trust, I caused tensions, I ruined friendships between others, I made some depressed, I did a lot of bad stuff but was smart enough to never cross the boundaries of illegal actions. All because I was in a bad place.
Back then, I loved it, today, it's eating me alive.
I know I need to be punished, and I know how much I deserve it. I deserve to be spanked. Maybe I deserve more than that, but I know a good spanking will help me be able to forgive myself for what I have done.
I have asked others for help, but they wouldn't do it.
So....I gotta ask something, and it's not for a meet-up. If you knew me, and I told you everything I did and asked for a spanking and whatever punishment you felt was necessary, what would you do?