My girlfriends kid gets on my nerves

I’ve been seeing my current girlfriend (26f, 33m) for 8 months and everything between us is great. She is sweet, patient, and understanding. She treats me really well. We’re currently doing long distance (1hr 30 distance) and I try to visit at least once a week.
After a few months of dating she decided to introduce me to her son. His dad is an abusive pos and that’s why she left him. She recently ended all contact with him because he was threatening her and his son, but that’s another story.
Her son (5yr old) isn’t necessarily a bad kid but he does get on my nerves and drains my energy fairly quickly and I feel like I’m starting to resent him because he’s always around and I think it’s going to affect my relationship with his mom eventually.
He seems to enjoy me being around according to his mom, he latched on to me immediately and always asks for me. When I visit he won’t sit still and is always crawling on me and getting in my face and it overstimulates me. One thing that bothers me about him is he is always walking around in his underwear and it took me announcing out loud that it makes me uncomfortable to have someone else’s child all over me in nothing but underwear so his mom started making him wear shorts or pjs when I’m around but never a shirt which still bothers me for some reason. He also tends to throw fits easily if he doesn’t get his way and it stresses my gf out to the point where she starts yelling at him but I don’t feel like he’s being held accountable for his actions or being properly disciplined. For example, he recently got upset because he couldn’t go to the beach after asking his mom several times so he got upset and punched her in the stomach which actually made her fall over and start crying. They eventually talked about it but I feel like nothing was done to prevent it from happening again as this isn’t the first time he has hit her.
I feel like an a****** because I don’t love this child but I love my girlfriend and I don’t want to feel like this but he’s not my child and I hate the way he treats his mom and the fact that he can’t sit still (my gf thinks he has adhd like she does, which makes sense.)
I’m just venting because I don’t think I’m ready to have this discussion with her about his behavior yet and I’m not sure if I’m wrong for feeling this way.

Nov 29, 2020

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