I need therapy

I did some stuff during all this covid-19 thing I am not proud of. Sometimes I can't sleep thinking about it and I am terrified I will run into one of the men.
I am only 22 and like an idiot got married to someone as young and dumb as me. We didn't have great jobs. Both of us worked at a restaurant cooking, serving and tending bar. When all the restaurants were shut down we were in trouble.
We were not living large and had a crappy apartment. Our landlord offered to let rent slide if I had s** with him twice a month. I did it but only on the condition he actually write us a receipt for rent paid in full every month. Even with rent covered we blew through the extra unemployment stuff quick. My husband is worthless and spent on stupid stuff. He started pushing me to start prostituting to bring in money. And stupid me! I did the nastiest things you can imagine, over months, for money. I guess I was lucky, I only ran into one bad apple. He drove me to an isolated location, beat, raped me and put me out to walk naked.
As soon as the restaurant reopened I went back. But I can't erase what happened.

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