Nyahh pt 2
Yknow... tbh, the lil one's actually really smart for her age, emotionally and ..academically? Idk how to put it she isn't in real school yet anyway if I look exhausted enough, she tries to figure out why and make me feel better. Yesterday, she asked me how my car ride was, and if I "had a bad car ride" and "ran into bumps". This was right after I met her from getting out of a car.
She also later on let me play project sekai, even though she had asked to play the burger game on my phone right before, telling me that she wanted to watch me play it. I knew she actually wanted the burger game. What a smart and caring kid.
None of this makes it easier to deal with having to cater to her despite my lack of energy, but it does establish the fact that she's definitely not at fault for my emotional deficits. Whenever I don't have enough energy for someone, usually it's more of a me problem than a them problem. What's most frustrating is that I don't have the chance to fix it before they (the guests) leave. I know I won't be able to replenish my energy any time soon, and it makes me not want to deal with/interact with them at all. It's completely hopeless.
The main problem I think I'm facing right now is that I havent replied to or talked to more than 3 important people at the moment.
3 people either called or texted me regarding my graduation, and I have yet to give them my thanks
1 person I have just not texted back yet in general, + she's also graduating this year, and so I missed getting to congratulate her along with 3 of my other friends too.
1 person I meant to get back into contact with like months ago and a couple of weeks ago, but still haven't done.
1 person I missed their birthday because I was supposed to make art for them but some ** was happening and I ment to make it the day after, but... Anyway it hasn't happened yet so. Uh. And now the month is almost over **
So yeah as you can see literally every problem I'm having is my fault, it's a domino effect, yatta yatta.
How I'm going to solve it? **, I don't ** know. If someone read this, I'm sure I've frustrated the ** out of them lmaooo because I'm kinda frustrated too. Have a good day anyway haha🎉
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