I can't help it...
I check the website history on my boyfriend's computer to see if he's been looking at any other girls or questionable websites.
Ever since the first time I found something that I almost couldn't forgive him for, it's been impossible for me to stop. If I find anything that upsets me... I stay mad at him for awhile and won't tell him the exact reason why.
I think he might know what I've been doing and have always known since that first time.. he just won't admit it. It makes me feel so depressed and unattractive when I find pictures of girls on his computer. I don't know what's acceptable or not acceptable for him to look at as a boyfriend. I just figured.. if it's not okay for him to look at them like that in person, why would it be okay on the internet?
It's literally driving me crazy... I wish I could stop. It's so hard to imagine him doing that to me. He's so sweet and wonderful... but the things I find make me feel like I can't trust him and don't know him as well as I think I do.
I think I'd be happier if I were ignorant of everything.