Skipped the wedding

... I f***** up. After agreeing to be a brides maid, i ended up skipping the wedding. I called the bride the morning of the wedding and lied, telling her that I could not stop vomiting so I was going to the hospital. She figured out the truth a few months later. I ordered my dress very close to the wedding date due to strained finances and I gained weight - the dress did not fit and realized this the day before the wedding. I feel so stupid selfish and ugly. my suicidal thoughts are around a lot more often now. I sometimes feel like I would rather end it over dealing with the consequences of telling the truth. I'm sure the couple could give two s**** about me at this point.

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  • Oh dear. I am not going to lie, you may have ruined this friendship. However, to me it sounds like you have more pressing problems, both financially and emotionally, that you need to get in order before you worry about trying to salvage this friendship. Get counseling and get your finances under control. When you are in a better place, it may be time to approach your friend. When she understands what you were going through, she may be forgiving. Or maybe not, but you need to take care of yourself first.

  • Call up the bride and tell her the truth and apologize. So it's not one of your finer moments. But if you guys are good friends then she'll understand. She just wanted you there. This isn't a reason to kill yourself over (not that there is one). So you f***** up.. the only person you're really hurting is yourself. Your friend will get over it. What this is, is a wake up call for you to start doing something to get yourself out of your rut. So if you're feeling fat, then hire a personal trainer or go to the gym. But make things right with your friend.

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