Im a person who suffers from depression, my parents dont noe coz they are busy with their life and being up themselves, i am not the only child. i have everything i want but they are only things, i buy things to make my self happy coz other people cant buy, but that happiness doesnt last very long.
everyone tells me im beautiful, but i dont see it, i dont wanna disrespect god of what he has given me and wake up the next morning an ugly face. i have really low self esteem and i am 20 years old with only one real friend, coz no one else likes me.
back when i was younger i used to suffer from an eating disorder just to get my parents attention, which finally worked after i ruined everything but now my weight is back to normal, i sometimes wake in the morning and i dont wanna get outta of bed coz i look and feel horrible. i always feel horrible, i cant tell my parents or anyone this coz they will think im stupid.
i cant even get a decent bf that would actually last with me more than a week, i dunno whats rong with me. no one eva comes up and talks to me.i hate myself, i cut myself, i dunno how else i am supposed to make myself suffer because im so stupid!!!!
my own best friend doesnt noe anything like this bout me, i done alot of stupid things to make myself feel betta in the slightest way, but everything keeps crashing down, everyone likes my brothers and my sister but just not me..i dunno what im doin rong!!!