Coworker is my best friend

There's a woman I've worked with for several years. We've always gotten along well, but in the last year or so we've become very close.

She's quite a bit older than I am (in her 50s), but we share similar tastes in books, music, humor, and all sorts of things. She's also very attractive, and I admit to having a small crush on her, but really her friendship is most important to me.

Problem is, we're both married, and even though neither one of us would want an affair, I feel guilty when I spend time with her.

I also feel like people in the office are probably talking about us. I mean, there are like 20 other guys in the office I could hang out with, but I'm always going out to lunch, the driving range, etc. with her because I enjoy her company the most.

If we were either both guys or both women, nobody would think twice about us being best friends. I've actually fantasized about what it would be like if I was a woman and we could do more things together.

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