I think im ugly, others say im not, but i can't stand the sight of myself. And sometimes my mom makes comments to me about my body, and my personality. yesturday, i had to excuse myself from a store, and cry in the mall bathroom. I never cry, but im just so worn out from feeling like a nothing that things get to me now. What really makes me feel hopeless is that i realized i have no parents any more. Each one of them had failed me, and it makes me think no one will ever want to be with me for that long. Because if my parents can't hang around me, who can? I wish i was invisible, and no one could see me. I could walk down the street and not be afraid that some one was going to look my way or stare. how can some one love me, if i dont love myself?

Aug 16, 2012

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  • Almost everyone feels this way, especially into early adulthood. You have to teach yourself that you're worthy of love, worthy of your place in this world. I still wonder where I'm going, and what I "want to be when I grow up." I'm 28, & still question what it is that I'm meant for.

    Don't think too badly of your parents, as much as that seems difficult to do-it could be worse. Trust me. My husband was beaten endlessly while growing up, and his father was always drunk or gone or beating his mother or siblings or him. That being said, he rose above it, put himself through school, supports me and is an incredibly loving father to our toddler.

    Everyone has their demons.
    We either rise above or fall behind. Don't ever forget how to love.
    If you have to look yourself in the mirror each day and say "I love you." Try it. Be kind to others. Meditate. Read. Strengthen your intellect, study yoga or exercise (releases endorphins)...
    Eventually you will feel centered. We all need balance.

    I felt much the same way you describe & I stumbled across a book that helped me understand why I felt the way I felt.
    Its called the art of happiness, by the dalai lama. I'm not trying to transform you to become buddhist, this is a book that states any religious belief is important & relevant, & so do I believe.

    I read that we all suffer. Its a natural state in human beings. We all suffer...physically, emotionally, etc. We all will experience this.
    The way to cope with it is to discover it's root-it's core-and do what you can to minimize the cause. It can be done!
    Good luck-and you are beautiful, no matter what anyone says!

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