1st off let me start by saying this is not a cry for attention, I'm just asking for help or advise.
Well, my life has been downhill since the day i was born. Let's start with my mom. She became addicted to drugs and alcohol at the age of 13. Then pregnant at 15 with my older sister. By the time I was born she was selling and making drugs in our home. My house was literally a meth lab. Now my dad was never in the picture. Until my mom got 13 years after being caught. When this append i was 4. I moved to my dads and there I had 2 brothers. My dad was physically abusive to all of us and his flip-flopping girlfriends. A year after i lived with them my brothers moved to Florid with there mom. My dad is an acholic and struggled to pay the bills and took his anger out on me. When I turned six he had got a girlfriend that we moved in with. She had two sons. As those years passed by she and my dad physically abused all of us. She was nice to me at first but as i got older and started to hit puberty at age 9, she started calling me a s*** and a w**** and ugly. Insecurity burned inside me. I began cutting to extinguish the pain. My mom released from prison early when I was 11. I've lived with her up till this point still going back and forth from my dads and her house. She has been clean for awhile but still drinks and is always bouncing to abusive boyfriends one of which beat her so bad he killed the baby he impregnated her with. Today I'm 14 years old. I have come to realize it doesn't get better. The only person who has actually helped me has stabbed my heart out. I'm just so done with life, people say i haven't even begun to live but i have and I'm done. I don't feel its worth it. I'm looking for help and advise from anyone. Thanks for reading.