My suicidal life

My mother keeps on telling me that I am a failure in academics. She always compares me with other people. All she talks about is how I don't care about my grades. But, just a few months ago, I tried to overdose on drugs. She caught me in the middle of the act. My mother did not talk about my grades again. Now, she forgot everything that had happened. I was trying to overdose because I felt like a worthless b****. I was staring at my grades and crying for I don't know how many hours each day. She now dares to tell me that I neglect my grades. What she doesn't know is that every day my tears are for the letters that determine my future. I am only graduating middle school in a few days. At this point, I will barely make it to my second year of high school. Maybe I won't even make it through half of freshman year. Every day, she sees me with a smile on my face, begging her to buy me clothes or makeup. But, in reality, once I'm on the other side of the door, I am in a state of depression and hysteria. I want to escape from my life. I can't bear to know that I will see these horrific letter grades splattered on papers and silver screens. They're the causes of my fake smiles and endless thoughts of suicide. People dearest to me, even strangers will ask about my grades. Humanity will keep me locked up in the chains of GPAs and grades unless I listen to my own heart. Commit suicide. But, I still dare to hold back for my dearest brother, friends, and relatives.

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  • It's not about your mother . It's about you . Stop the madness move on . Make your move for you , not everyone else , a b grade or even a c people still pass classes . Stand up for you . I don't know you , but I'm very proud of you . GOOD luck , you and only you are the move you make .

  • Pull yourself together and give it all you got, no one can blame anyone who tries their best. Actually it is usually the one who makes middle grades, not the top of the class, that makes a mark in life. Few successful people were at the top of their class.

  • I can be suicidal too, but I use it as inspiration for my writing and art projects. If you do this, maybe you could impress your mother with your grades. Besides, the only reason she is telling you that you are worthless is probably because she was told the same thing as a child. Don't listen to your mother's opinion, that will only make your grades worse. I hope I helped!
    -VanishingLuna

  • Be strong honey, grades aren't everything

  • Do you know about reddit/r/raisedbynarcissists? Give it a try, might help you.

  • You are not someone else's property. You have to believe in yourself and live the life you are destined for. It may not be what your mother or others want but it will be your life. So many people with bad grades go on to live fantastic lives. Your time at home and at school is very short even though it seems long right now. Before you know it you'll be free from this and live a great life. This pain right now may actually make you become a person who empathizes with those less fortunate. Down the road, you may be the person to help others out of their pain.

  • As much as you live for your friends and family, your friends and family live for you, too. If you're feeling weak and you don't let them know, how is that not betrayal? Even if you don't physically harm yourself, continuing on like this without reaching out to them is venomous for everyone involved. Get help, already.

  • Your mom is a b*&$? she has nothing to talk to you about except for grades and that is her fault, not yours. I know it's hard now, but if you can ignore her and get involved in other activites (any kind of after school program or even a job) just to get away from her. You are so young and have so many good years ahead of you, you just don't know it yet. I was like you when I was younger and had vowed to kill myself if life wasn't better when I was 20. It turned out that I got stronger and I MADE life better by choosing good people to be around me and what I wanted to do and be. Be strong sweetie, I hope you know that you are worth more than what one person has to say.

  • Seriously, your life doesn't depend on grades. Seriously, seriously, seriously. If you make it to an older age, you'll look back and wonder what the fuss was about.

  • What kind of grades are we talking about? C's? D's, F's. Everybody isn't cut out to be a scholar. Do as well as you can and when you get out of high school go to technical school and learn a trade. You'll be ok.

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