Does everybody cheat?

I may be old fashioned. Im currently in a relationship. Im 30 and this is my 3rd boyfriend. My first boyfriend was mentally abusive. I don't talk about him. Was a long time ago. I'm over it. 2nd boyfriend cheated constantly so we broke up. I stayed on my own for a while. I was not one of these girls that feels like I have to have to have a bf. Then along came my current bf. After much wooing, he finally won me over and I decided to give him a chance. Everything was ok till I discovered he had been upto no good whilst he was a taxi driver with his customers. Nothing physical happened but he was hitting on girls etc.
We have dealt with it but I cant get it out of my head. I've spoken to people about it and they say to basically just get over it like it's a normal thing. Like im supposed to just accept this? Im being treated like im wrong to expect loyalty in a relationship. Is being faithful a thing of the past?

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  • Being faithful has never existed, so get used to it. Both men and women have always cheated throughout history and cheating was always accepted and dealt with for the sake of the children and in the eyes of God. The only difference is that now women have the legal right to file for divorce, and collect a cash reward, if the guy doesn't stay faithful and even if she isn't putting out. The free government money racquet is breaking up our families............

  • The married man I am having an affair with actually seems like the type of man you could NEVER imagine cheating, but his s** life is unsatisfactory even after trying to work on it, his wife's health is not great, they've been together a long time and it's all become very routine, his job is very stressful, his home life is kind of stressful too...I am his outlet. He's not leaving his wife though, nor do I expect or want him to. His wife is blissfully unaware, and reaping the benefits of a more relaxed husband. Unfortunately, I think the reality is that the expected marriage model is just too rigid and is becoming antiquated. And one type of marriage doesn't fit all. We, as a society, need to look at marriage outside the box I think.

  • This is very good. Women and men are SUPPOSED to take care of each other. Too often, that doesn't happen, and it is very hurtful. People need the healing that intimacy gives. It seems to me to be profoundly selfish to expect someone to live a wretched existence because one party can't bother to care for the other. Why WOULDN'T you want a person for whom you care to be cared for well?

    Instead of being angry at the other man/woman, perhaps some gratitude might be in order.

  • I think you're right. Both sides need to give, and take care of each other. And if one party can't or won't there needs to be some give somewhere. How can a man or woman be expected to live out the rest of their life without touch and intimacy, or with very little?

  • I feel ur pain, yes everyone cheats especially men. They don't value marriage like women do and it hurts. They even blame us for it.

  • It's sad, but yes......modern relationships are in a shambles because fidelity is in a shambles. No one is willing to accept personal responsibility for their actions anymore, nor willing to hold someone else in higher esteem than they hold themselves. People have become FAR more self-centered and self-seeking. You shouldn't have to accept that, but it has become a fact.

  • You shouldn't accept it. I've been married 22 years, and yeah, I know my husband looks at p***, jerks off to that stuff, and whatever. But he doesn't seek out real women or act inappropriately at work. He is committed to me. That is not an unreasonable request in a relationship.

  • Yes it is unreasonable the whole thing is

  • Thank you. This gives me hope

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