For the last 2 years, my wife has accused me of cheating on her with a woman she knows at work. The accusations are constant and ugly. She's wrong about it: I've never been with the woman she accuses me of sleeping with. The problem is that I have been having an affair with an older woman who was the matron of honor in our wedding. Keri and I have been involved since before my wife and I got married, almost from the very first day my wife introduced me to her. Keri has been married the entire time, but that never stopped us from being together. I would have married Keri instead, but she wouldn't leave her husband because they have kids together. So, I deny my wife's accusations because I know they aren't true, but I'm never as forceful in my denials as I would be because she is right about my having affair, just not who it's with. It's an awkward place to be, but I can't help it. The only thing I could do is break it off with Keri. I've tried that, but we keep coming back together. She's too good to end it.

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  • You should tell your wife and let her decide what to do with you. She deserves better and she must sense that you are unfaithful. If you care for her at all then let her go; you are wasting her life and time and life is short. Not really fair to her husband either. Sooner or later it will come back to you.

  • Remove the religion and maybe people will stop making in un realistic promises.......that go against natural behaviour

  • My wife acused me of having an affair which I wasn't then went out and had an affair to eaven the score which it didn't then when she finally realised her mistake she beat her self up on it. My take is that one needs to chill a bit and not go off in such an extreme and emotional way. Just take it slow and hug her.

  • You HAVE to break it off with Keri. Eventually, the relationship is going to come to light, and it's not going to look quite so beautiful to you then. Your wife is going to hate you, and you are going to hate yourself. And then, when her husband discovers it, Keri is going to hate you, too. End it now, before it's too late to control it.

  • Maybe having different people to fulfil different needs is the way to go.

    We have friends at work and friends we play sport with and gym buddies and so on. Each of these fulfils a need.

    A husband and wife together apart from anything else is best for raising kids.

    But at some stage that one and only may move away from you. No longer gets turned on by you. Frustration, disconnect, disrespect unfulfilled expectation. Whatever!

    So maybe it's OK to fil some of those gaps through an intimate sexual partner.

  • I agree with you. But only if the wife and husband are in agreement with this. So no one is cheating on each other.

  • I agree with this person.

  • You are a bad man.

  • She's obviously not good enough to be loyal to. Grow up, be a man, and be faithful to your wife, or leave her.

  • The husband has the problem, not the wife. To insinuate otherwise, is insulting to the wife!

  • Not necessarily. Maybe, the husband isn't a good, loyal man and doesn't respect his wife and their vows. You should grow up!!

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