I can't

I just married the most amazing man , but I wish he would not have taken on a challenge of helping his mother raise his cousin. This little boy was taken in when his mother's sister past away during birth. He was born a drug baby , so you know what comes after. His mother thought she was doing a good thing taken in this kid, but I think it was the worst mistake she ever did. She has made my husband take care of everything . This kid is f**** lazy and my husband does everything for him. For now the kid lives with my husbands parents, but he keeps saying that it's getting tough for his parents who are older. I honestly wish the kid did not exist. I could have a normal marriage without the extra burdens of dealing with an Autistic kid. The mother is trying to wash her hands by saying that he's getting tough for her and the she is old .... she should have never F***** taken him from that hospital in the first place, if she was was going to assign the burden to my husband. The kid does not like me because when he comes over I make him follow the rules. He always says I want to go home with my mom and in my mind I say "I can't wait". I am a very sympathetic person, but I wish he was never born. My husband has had many failed relationships. Not because he is a bad person, but because of his mothers choice of taking in this kid. Those women saw the writing on the wall and ran. I love him to much to run away, but sometimes I second guess my choice. I told my husband that I don't want to take him in until there is no option. He is autistic and may never be able to live a normal life. Meaning that we have to deal with him for the rest of his life. He wants him with us , because it will easier for my husband ,but I don't want to deal with him. Once a week is plenty. I am miserable when he is around and the older he gets the more mouthy he is. I find that he knows exactly what he's doing and thats why he doesn't want to come over. He knows I don't put up with his s***. If he didn't know any better he would say nothing. With him saying I want to go home to my mom when I discipline him, proves to me that he knows what he can get away with. So I will continue to be tough so that he doesn't want to come over.

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  • You may need to be the bad guy like I was looked at. I was expected to handle my parents bad choices and then both sisters. After a while I said enough is enough and I wouldn't do it. I caught a lot of grief but I lived at a home a happy camper. No I wouldn't allow anyone to move in her finance there bad financial management. When I refused my mother to move in for the final time she turned the fam on my wife as being the cause.

    Don't allow the kid to move and and become your burden, it will be the end of you and your marriage.

  • There is absolutely no reason for you to have to have this child come live with you and disrupt your life. It will destroy your relationship with your husband and probably end your marriage due to resentment.
    You need to have a talk with your husband explain to him how having this kid around effects you ,how he stresses you out and you don't want him to live with you. You have to consider your well being and happiness. He isn't your responsibility.

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