Me and my mom disowned everything and our family
I confess that me and my mom were brought up in a cruel world , (1960’s) she lost her mom at the age of 5 years old and she was sexually abused in school and she was brought up by her loving grandparents, she called her grandpa daddy .
but her grandparents disowned the real father , in her teenage years she lost her grandpa , than last of all she lost her grandma of whom was the last of her parents . She grew up with relatives and had a hard life and than she met my dad .
And she had 2 sons and than a 3rd son through C-section in her 30’s ( which was me) , out of all her children ( 1980’) , she loved me the most that she sent me to a private school while my older brother went to a public school , than something bad happened .
the eldest brother sexually abused me , and the middle brother protected him from the truth that he not only sexually abused me , he sexually abused the middle brother , as I grew older I saw that he spied on my mom through a secret crack in the shower , I wanted too F*** ing kill him for disrespecting her like that , and I was not aware about what had happened to me while I was younger , but i was sexually active , so much so that I had relationship with Friends my age , I stayed away from my eldest brother and middle brother ( I hated them both ) and I had friendships with boys and girls , but mostly boys , ( I had bisexual kisses with boys for as long as I could, in private ) ( late 1980’s - to 1998 divorce year to my dads family)
Than it happened in my teenage years , I started to get with Girls , but my Erotic behaviour got to me and I went to kiss girls , but it was too much , and I started to get strange feelings in my groin area, that I retreated from the girls not knowing what was happening, than I had my first sexual experience in my teenage year of grade 8 , but I blew it when I did not know what to do , I walked out of the bedroom with her naked and me not interested in s** , I started to have more Girlfriends and stayed away from boys cause I now hated not only my brother , I hated all boys as well and avoided them to be with girls .
Than my mom found out that I was sexually abused by not only my eldest brother , but physically abused by my dad , so she left and moved 100 miles away from them and took me with her , she and I stayed away for 3 whole years with no contact with my dad or brothers
than in 2003 , I started working because I was over my mental illness , than she gotten breast cancer in 2006 , it brought her down to nothing , her last wish to me in 2007 was to disown my whole dads side of the family, just like her grandparents disowned her own dad who was a dead beat and she died in April 17th 2007 from severe cancer , i obeyed her last wish and disowned my dads whole side of the family and she forbid me from attending the funeral of my dad and my brothers for what they did too me in making me sexually active at a young age . She hated everybody on my dads side of the family .