It started a long time ago
It all started when I was about 8 years old I would get some of my moms stockings and a pantie girdle and put them on, that was the first time I every wore womens clothes. As this progressed I would try on her dresses and makeup when my parents were at work I use to love being all girly one day I was in the bathroom dressed up when my parents came home I locked the door to the bathroom and I heard them call me I shouted back that I was in the bathroom they came up knocking on the door I had already started to take the clothes off but they were all around the bathroom and I had no where to put them they told me to open the door "I told them I would be a few minutes " but then the door was false open and there I was with my moms clothes all around there was shock on there faces and they walked away nothing was ever said about the incident, when I started dating my wife I use to drive a van and there was a space in the back of the centre seat wear I use to keep some shoes stockings and underwear one day on her day off she came out on my deliveries and found my stash she waited till we got home then asked my about them she thought I had another girl and that i was cheating on her but i told her the clothes were mine two days later everything went back to normal we've now been married 30 years she helps me buy clothes, shoes and makeup but she doesn't like to get involved with my dressing up but she did find my ** no so long ago, we haven't slept in the same bed for a long time and she doesn't know that I have had some men in my life as well I just wish she would make me her ** and make me dress fulltime.
I still do dress up and go out dressed
I wish girls like us could meet up
It's a mixed up world. My mom was really relaxed about me as a kid wanting to wear girls clothes. She bought me tights and a girls one piece swimming costume that I wore just once to the beach when I was 8. She offered to buy me dresses and to take me far away from home to wear them but I never had the courage.
Fast forward and I got married. I was always hetro. I wanted to wear girls clothes but I never saw myself as a girl. I loved the look and especially the feel.
Problem was my wife was not cool like my mom. She saw it as evidence that I was some how faulty or broken and had to be fixed. Eventually she found so many things wrong with me. Everything I did seemed to be wrong. No matter that I paid off our house. Paid for the kids to go private school. Even paid her when she wanted to be a stay at home mom. She had this huge list of my failings and would bring it up whenever she had been triggered.
Then she left me.
That is a really great confession and so honest. I lived with the same desire that you have ever since I was little. It continued into married life and I was caught by my wife fully dressed with a male lover in our house. My wife divorced me quite understandably!!!
However, I recovered from that costly experience and have lived my life as female ever since. I have always felt feminine and as a man I looked effeminate so It was reasonably easy for me to partially transition (I have kept my male bits) and with exercise I am a slim size 12, 5ft 6", with long legs and smooth feminine skin.
I love going out dressed in lovely lingerie and floaty dresses and high heels, it still feels wicked!!
I have three married lovers and I adore them.
It is your life and you went through tough times to achieve it. You have chosen happiness and are probably a very mentally healthy person as a result.
I believe I am now, but I was very troubled growing up. I loved girls, but at the same time I wanted to be like them and my family was very conventional.
The adjustment to becoming female and gay was hard but very fulfilling.