I still love you
I still am in love with you. I've tried to move on and set my soul free but no matter what i do, you're always a constant memory in the back of my head reminding me of our once strong bond. I would've crossed the ocean, flew to the moon, fought wars and walked through h*** for you to have stayed with me. I would've put you on a throne. Loving you was like standing in a desert and wishing for rain because you were my heaven. You were my world and i was the moon, revolving around you always. I struggle to get out of bed every morning and continue on everyday knowing that I'm slowly suffocating by the thought of not having you in my life. You moved on so easily while I sit and lie here still in pain. Nobody understands, not even I do. You were the first person to show me love, you brought colour to my black heart. When i started opening up to you, you left me. I shared some of the most sensitive secrets with you that i had never told anyone. I cried listing them out for you as you assured me that you loved me and everything would be okay. You often told me stories about how so many girls broke your heart and from that moment, I made it my mission to never hurt you. I would go through all this pain so you wouldn't have to. You were the type to smile at me and then rip my heart out of my chest. All i ever wanted was for you to love me, but you never did. You were so scared of me breaking you, so you broke me instead. And through this all, I'd still defend you, do anything for you, go through all this hurt and take a bullet straight through my brain and yet, you wouldn't do the same. You only wanted me for my body. When you got overwhelmed, you left me and now, I'm a bomb waiting to detonate. I am a train wreck going off the tracks slowly and yet, I still love you. I wish I could just move on, the scars that litter my thighs are a constant reminder of the pain i went through because of you. We were always a losing game but yet, we still got addicted to the game and we still carried on and hurt each other.