Funny day at the lake...
Big ass women seem to be a topic lately. I can add a funny, yet embarrassing story of my own from the summer. We live in a neighborhood that borders a small lake. Some of the residents have cut out trails down to the lake and we even constructed a "poor mans" dock with some lumber and 55 gallon drums.
One day back in summer my daughter and two of her friends went down to swim and get some sun. In the afternoon I decided to get some air and exercise, so I walked down to check on them. They were having a great time and kept asking me to "jump in". I declined as I had no bathing suit. One of the girls jumped out of the water, got in her bag and threw me a spare towel and bikini. I said what the heck.
I walked behind some bushes and changed. Well I "TRIED" to change into her bikini. My 45 year old, fat ass trying to squeeze into a two piece bikini of a 17 year old. Let me describe the HORROR! It was a normal two piece bikini, "NOT" a thong. The bottoms were stretched to the point of breaking and on my big behind it was butt floss. Now to the front. Her little B cup might look good in this thing, but my mom D's didn't fit. It barely covered my nipples if I held it in place. And the most embarrassing thing was the front with a mega camel toe and my unshaved status hanging out everywhere!
I couldn't help but laugh so I jumped out from behind the bushed and went "TA DA"! The girls nearly drowned they were laughing so hard. I took a run and jumped in.
Maybe a half hour later I got a shock. Four of the neighborhood boys walked down the path. I should have seen it coming, where there are teenage girls, there are teenage boys. I sunk down in the water to me neck to hide.
A couple of the boys hit the water and two were just hanging out.
Eventually I was in an tough spot. I needed to get back to the house and start dinner. I had to suck it up. It climbed onto our little deck and walked over to my towel. My t*** were falling out everywhere, not to mention the freak show going on below. The boys got one heck of a show. I grabbed my stuff and walked back to the house.
Funny thing is, since then I have noticed the boys are coming around the house a lot! And I am mature enough to see it just isn't because of my daughter. I realize how they are looking at me now. I kind of like it.