Hotwifing troubles

My wife and I have been involved in hotwifing for the last five months. For me, it's been an unmitigated disaster, especially the holidays. For her, it's been perpetual spring break. I thought that allowing her to see other men -- while I kept myself for her -- would make her feel more happy and complete, and that it would enegerize our s** life at home. And that she'd go out occasionally at night, but then always come home to me and our child after she'd finished with whoever she was with. The hotwifing site we used said to let her find her way, and to give it awhile to even out, but things aren't getting better: she's just going out more often, and staying out longer, sometimes for several days at a time, without calling or coming home. When I express my reservations to her, all I get is: "You agreed to this because you SAID you love me, and you can't back out now after we've just started it". Have any of you had experience with hotwifing? DOES it get better? Or am I just a Class-One moron for supporting her while she lives her life like she's not married (except for the fact that she's living that life on my bank account and credit card) and not a mother?

Feb 19, 2012

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  • Sorry but I would guess a class one moron. Fell into the same trap but only had one experience and I’m putting a stop to it.

  • Your wife now has a Very hot full time relationship With someone else's big d***. And based upon what you have said your paying for it!!!!!!! Both of you need to give up the life or you give up her. Before she drains you for every penny you got . and her new main man Lives happily ever after with your money.... Wake up man You're now classified as an embarrassment of men. We're getting suckered like this.

  • She is draining her new lover's b**** and her husband's bank account. Must be nice

  • Yup you’re a world class moron

  • Sounds like it turned to a cuckold relationship

  • Be a f****** man and f*** her in the ass and then leave the s***, your better off alone than with a w**** who begs for other c**** and then blames you for it.

  • Going to a concert my wife had on a regular dress and as always with no panties. That morning and afternoon of the concert I f***** her and as always she left it wet and dripping down her leg. So right before leaving for the concert she changes into what was called a "T-shirt dress". Basically like a T-shirt it just about covered her ass and hairy p****. Then she bent over and I f***** her. Then she took a pee standing up, Then she went in my desk and got a girlie book and jerked off and squirted on the floor. After she had squirted and right before we left she bent over and I f***** her again, and she was so wet and open I just put it in between her legs and it slipped in easily until I came in her again. Never did she wipe her p**** and then we went to a fast food place as we didn't have time for a restaurant and she was dripping everywhere. At the concert and in the 1st row she opened her legs wide and flashed the musicians. Then on the way home I had to stop on a side street and took her outside of the car, bent her over and shot one more load in her. That was the sluttiest she ever was.

  • That's hot

  • You and her are not hotwifing. She is being a wh*** and basically cuckolding you. Hotwifing would be you deciding who she has s** with. You need to assert some dominance and get her in line. The husband is in control in actual hotwifing situations.

  • Exactly!

  • Hotwifing needs a well defined written agreement from the start. It needs to provide mutual benefit to the marriage. There needs to be very open communication of desires, feelings, limits & date details. If this all works. Hotwifing can add excitement & warmth to the marriage.

  • Yes - A well thought out, by both, written agreement & very open communication (no secrets) is essential. The agreement must have equal concern for both. It must include a paragraph concerning methods to modify running rules & terms for veto. It also must establish goals.

  • I'd say she's actually just cheating on you. I got my wife into hotwifing, and she's had s** with many of my male friends, mostly threesomes (with another guy and me), but we do it together. We've also had foursomes with other couples, where I f*** the other wife, but not too often. But we do it together, everything is up-front and we know what is going on. Then we pick up the kid from grandma's and continue our regular domestic life as a committed married couple/family. I think you need to set some boundaries/rules.

  • As someone who's been on both ends of the spectrum I have to say you're making a mistake. For years I was the young black guy with a thick c*** s******* other men's wives as they watch. When I got older I allowed my wife at the time and later my girlfriend to s**** other guys. Let me tell you it never works out the way you think it will. If you want to try fix this then you should establish some rock solid ground rules and if she is unwilling go along with that then it's just a matter of time before she's out the door. One rule is she should never be allowed to have s** with someone that you haven't met and spoken with at some length. Another rule is a curfew. Still yet another rule is she should not be able to do this more than twice a month. Remember you're not a cockhold you're a man allowing your wife it go out and have fun with other men. There's a small but definite difference between the two. If you keep letting her screwed guys as she pleases then one day she will walk out the door because you will be nothing more than an afterthought.

  • Really, it is all just how you look at the situation. The truth is that many husbands find your situation very enviable, but some clearly do not. You choose, do you want to be happy? Focus and think about the fact that you did, at least once WANT her to be a "hotwife," now that she has tried it out, she wants to keep on being a hotwife and you have changed you mind. Why? Just how and why did you change in your thinking about it? Is it that she is enjoying the fun and you don't seem to be having any fun in it at all? Suggest that she bring you on board with the fun parts as well, she can at least talk to you about her fun with other men, and maybe one or two nights you can arrange for the children to stay elsewhere while you and your wife entertain a "guest" in your home and you can also enjoy the fun parts. If the whole scene is just not for you then it is just not for you, but you really do need to remember that you did in fact WANT it to be this way (at least you thought you did), and there are many husbands who do live very happily as cuckolds - but I honestly do believe that those happy husbands (cuckolds) are paired up with "hotwives" who continue to love their husbands, and share the fun with their husbands. I honestly hope that you take stock of your situation and think this through, there it every probability that you can live a long and happy life without denying these pleasures to your wife, and your wife just needs to remind you (and herself) that she does love you.

  • Not good,my wife ended up doing two or more bulls at once,she got addicted to it.were divorced now

  • Never go into cuckolding (this isn't hotwifing) without ground rules. The one rule that is most important is if either husband or wife wants it to end. Don't break that rule. If you are arguing now concerning you want it to stop. That is a red flag and it needs to end now. It is suppose to be about the marriage, and at this point keeping it together. #1 You need to demand she obey to rules or #2 stay unhappy until it ends or you divorce # 3 Show her extra love ans accept him desires.

  • It’s a shame that it’s gone so far. I’ve been in this type of relationship for two years and the first thing we did was set boundaries. It works very well for us. My wife stays out no more than two nights per month which are pre arranged and always comes home to me. Sometimes I watch, sometimes I’m next door but mostly I’m not there. That’s better for both of us so long as she doesn’t shower before coming home. I have no interest In other women and our s** life is better than it’s ever been. Boundaries are the key.

  • My wife and I have been doing this for 5 years and it works very well if it’s being done with agreements for both. She has been with a friend of mine for a year and works very well for all the parties involved. No drama and discretion is a must. It has made our relationship better and stronger.

  • Getting on the internet and asking about your wife is like asking on a boat "wheres the captain "oh he hopped a life boat supposed to call tomorrow ot sumn i dont. U heard a anything? Lol humans ugh i woulda done 40 days n 40 nights too geez

  • Im a 45 y.o male who has a hot wife and loves it s** is great and you need to set boundries holidas should be with family .And she needs to come home and take care of you as well.

  • 7 days lol u know their laughing bout him as they f*** is she using his credit card for hotel to f*** the other guys this man needs to take his child to the state and drop her off n save her life n he go stand next to a truck clear trees n stick his head right next to the chipper shredder n do what comes natural 😀🌴

  • You are a dumb ass

  • This is a hoax to attract people to wife sharing sites...

  • If i was the child i would f****** run away from home and be a hippie on drugs and it would be perfectly understandable. Because first of all i won't want to live with a mother that is an abuser, and i won't look my father in the eyes for going trough that, and i won't assume going to the psychologist and my teachers at schools and say that mommy loves to be f***** by a lot of men and my father is actually being abused because he loves her.

  • My father in law always says that nothing drives his wife haywire like a handsome man, well, the same holds true for her daughter, my wife can't control herself around attractive men, she blushes, her nipples harden, she breathes heavily and wets down under, pretty much like a female dog in standing heat. Fortunately I learned this before we marry so I got to understand she is not a cheater in her heart; although she does physically surrenders to other men. I would not call her a hotwife if she were not attractive but she meets both criteria. If I am around she might not stray but there's no hope when she's on her own.

  • Dude, Dump your wife.
    Your being used. your not hotwifing your wife is dating.

    You should always be there

  • Why are you not seeing people also? I don't get why you would agree to just her doing this. I just heard of all this, so excuse my naivety, but what was in it for you when you agreed?

  • Because a woman should be able to f*** whoever she want whenever she wants and a real man should support her needs

  • And a man should be able to f*** whatever woman he wants too!

  • Yes, I have experience with this. I felt the EXACT same way. My wife and I did set up ground rules. But it became something that couldn't live with and something she couldn't part with. We had so many arguments over this exact thing. I felt so guilty because it was my fantasy turned reality. I started to not feel special, as if not only my TIME and s** with her were secondary. I voiced this many times, but we always ended up in the same spot with her guilting me and me feeling bad about having created this monster so I let her continue until I was done. I started having major self-esteem problems and gained a lot of weight. The truth is that it became all about her and not about us. I learned that in order for this type of lifestyle (not just swinging but hotwifing especially because there is a HUGE difference when only one partner steps out) to work that the couple must remain the primary focus. That, of course, is true not only with hotwifiing but in all things including having children, house, jobs, ect. The marriage and couple must held as sacred if it is to survive. Once that has been broken, there is little chance for recovery. My advice to anyone who endeavors to seek the hotwife lifestyle is to make it about your marriage first and that is extremely hard to do. It must start with a healthy marriage with great communication with 2 people who are very much in love. Anything else and you probably can kiss the marriage goodbye. Btw, today I'm so much happier. True, we are no longer married, but I respect myself again. Hmm, maybe it took hotwifing for us to see that the marriage really wasn't working anyway. Good luck my friend. I've been there, it sucks...

  • Why is the hotwifing done outside the house. How on earth is that beneficial to you? You mentioned it was your fantasy at first. But wouldn't you want it done in your home so you could watch or something? I just don't get how you thought it would fulfill your fantasy.

  • It’s choice. It’s the way my wife and I do it. We both prefer it so long as she doesn’t clean up before she comes home.

  • Absolutely great advice! Hotwifing must be practiced around the marriage and relationship, not around hotwifing. The couple must be very strong in their love and respect for each other and their family. Ground rules are good, but they will change as the couples adapts to the lifestyle. It can enhance the relationship for some couples, but be warned, it can also destroy it! My wife has been a hotwife for four years. She has had younger, older, white, and black lovers. She has fun and I love for her to date. Our s** life together is still great too. I am a cuckold. How else could I want this for her?

  • You are so cool, with an awesome marriage and wife, kudos, Itoo am a cuckhold.

  • Vice provokes regrets. It's in the nature of the thing.

  • You definitely screwed the pooch on this one. Before any type of "extra curricular activities" take place you should always set ground rules. The Mrs. and I have been swinging for several years and the first thing we did was set up rules which both of us agreed on, and abide by. To help reign things back in you should probably point her in the direction of a swingers club or house party (that you can go to), so you can have some type of experience to make you feel a little more evened out, try to move her into another area of this type of lifestyle.

  • Haha Funny as s*** you Fool.

  • Yes tell us all as the couch awaits. .."Tell us bud Tell about your relationship with your mother when u were a lad"?

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